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1802260
46 January 10 • 2013
walked into his office. Chuck
Thav, my partner of 31 years,
was on the phone. He was listen-
ing and not speaking. As I went to
sit down, with flair he dropped the
phone down into its cradle discon-
necting the call. He immediately
redialed a number, and I looked at
him. He put a finger up as if to say,
"Wait:' So I waited.
This time, he put the phone in
the speaker cradle so I could hear.
Again, he listened and, with the
same flair, returned the phone to the
cradle. This time he looked at me
and broke into his ever-famous wide
grin.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"Calling the IRS," he said.
"Looks like you have developed a
new strategy ... call and hang up.
Very clever," I said.
"I'm calling the automated collec-
tion department. If I don't like the
tone of the collection representative's
voice or if they are not giving me the
right vibes, I just hang up and call
back until I find some-
one who sounds nice," he
replied.
He dialed again. The
voice on the other line was
a friendly female voice. I
sat and watched as Chuck
worked out a beneficial
payment plan for a client
that was severely behind
in his income tax liability
— with minimal available
cash to make monthly pay-
ments. I looked at Chuck and said,
"Well done. How many times do you
hang up and try again?"
He replied with a wink in his eye,
As many as it takes:'
That was nearly 15 years ago, and
the hanging up became known as the
"Chuck Strategy." (I'm not going to
tell you the strategy's real name). We
immediately adopted it office wide,
and the rule has become a staple
item in many of the unique strate-
gies that evolved over the last 30
years in our effort to address client
issues.
I'm sharing this "secret" with
you because, sadly, Chuck passed
away just before the New Year after
waging an incredible four-year
battle with ALS. At the shiva, I was
reminded of the tradition to share
stories about the loved one lost. This
is my story, and I'm sharing it now.
Over the last few years, I have
learned that so many people have
lost a loved one to ALS and under-
Chuck Thav
stand its relentless and dispassionate
course. When you face such circum-
stances, financial stress, domestic
stress or parental stress all pale in
comparison — in fact, they're not
even close.
Chuck sought every
available means he could
muster to fight ALS with
determination — but
even with his sometimes
stubborn determination,
in the end, he could not
win. There is no winning
or beating ALS. The best
part, however, is that he
didn't lose. ALS claimed
his body and ultimately
his life, but it never
impinged his spirit.
I, like so many, say, "I could never
live that way:' Chuck did. I know he
wasn't happy about it, but he did not
complain. With technology, when he
lost use of his limbs and all motor
abilities were gone, he could email
by using a wink of his eye to work
the keys. He emailed me often —
and never once complained. Most of
the time, he was asking about others.
"How are the kids?"
He always had a smile and a
smirk. As the disease progressed, his
smirk endured to the end. I know if
I asked him, "So how long are you
going to keep that smirk?" He would
certainly reply, As long as it takes:'
Goodbye, my friend.
❑
Ken Gross is an attorney with Thav
Gross and host of The Financial Crisis
Talk Center, which airs at 8:30 Saturday
mornings on WDFN 1130 AM radio andl
p.m. Sundays on MyTV20. In 1982, he and
Chuck Thav started Thav Gross.