points of view >> Send letters to: letters@thejewishnews.com Guest Column Editorial Sandy Hook Aftermath Love is a matter of national security. T his week we are a nation of kin- dred American spirits in a state of collective grief. We are a post- Connecticut school-shooting nation. This week we give our children extra kisses while our hearts break for the par- ents who will never be whole again in the wake of the Dec. 14 shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., where a lone gunman murdered 20 children and six adults. Our lips pressed against our children's foreheads — we kiss the Connecticut parents' children through ours. This week we are grieving the loss of basic trust in the safety of our schools as we question whether we can trust that the children we put on the school bus in the morning will safely return to us in the afternoon. We grieve the assur- ance of believing that the world outside of our homes is basically a sane and sound destination. Even the president is griev- ing on national TV, shedding tears in real time as he discloses the day's event. For this, I am grateful. I trust a president who grieves when children die. He knows there is no better place, no higher cause; he wants his children alive here and now. We ask in countless conversations: • "Does this happen in other places?" We remind each other of Norway in July 2011; Germany on March 11, 2009; and France on March 19, 2012. But when we really look at mass school shootings as a phenomena since the wave began in 1996, it is unavoidable to confront the reality that there is something uniquely American about this kind of violence. • "Why doesn't this happen in Israel where there are young people armed with machines guns literally every- where?" Have you shopped the streets of Tel Aviv or sat in a Jerusalem cafe? Within sight, there are machine guns slung over the arms of hundreds of teenagers and young adults. To add to the risk, these same "kids" take their weapons home when they are off duty. When I was a young adult living in Israel, my Israeli boyfriend brought his M-16 home, and we stored it for the weekend in our broken washing machine. Children whose lives are revered learn how to revere the lives of others. to hide if a gunman enters their school building? Does it lie in mental health ser- vices or anti-bullying campaigns? Certainly, in part, it does. But these are not real cures. The cure for the nation lies where it always has — closer to home. I want to suggest that the solution rests in lov- ing our children. Children who are loved and nurtured do not murder other chil- dren. Children whose lives are revered learn how to revere the lives of others. Children who have a sense of community and feel safe emotionally, physically and spiritually in their homes do not murder people. Erich Fromm, a Jew who fled Nazi Germany, spent his life trying to understand the irrationality of mass human behavior. In his book The Art of Loving, he writes: "Is love an art? Then it requires knowl- edge and effort ... (People) are starved for it; yet hardly anyone thinks that there is anything that needs to be learned about love:" Power Of Love We have a lot of learning to do about how to love our children so that they learn how to love themselves. We have a lot of work to do in transforming our communities into sanctuaries where parents and chil- dren know they belong. We need to be teaching love as an art form in our elementary schools and in our universities. There should be entire departments devoted to love studies. We should be leading experts in how to build ties, heal alienation, engender altruism and create communities that are extensions of home. This is the cure. Herein lies the hope. It is urgent. Love has become a matter of national security. ❑ What Is The Answer? Does the solution lie in gun control? Or in metal detectors, alarms and guards — and drilling into children where and how Rabbi Tamara Kolton, Ph.D., of Farmington Hills, is a spiritual leader and psychologist in Metro Detroit. Hasty Timing Damages Latest Settlement Plan I srael's timing in advancing plans to build 3,000 new housing units in the West Bank and eastern Jerusalem left a lot to be desired. Formulating the plans to build in the E-1 area between eastern Jerusalem and the West Bank settle- ment of Ma'ale Adumim immediately after the U.N. General Assembly granted the Palestinian Authority's request to upgrade the Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO) to non-member observer state status proved, unfortunately, a worldwide public relations fiasco. The UNGA vote is nonbinding and doesn't create a sovereign state of Palestine. Only the U.N. Security Council has the power to recognize states; last year, it rejected the PLO's unilateral statehood bid. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu either didn't sense the global out- cry, even among Israel supporters, to his Cabinet decision or that the fragile two-state solution is still at play. England, France, Sweden, Spain and Denmark called in their respective Israeli ambassadors to condemn the decision. The Arab world proclaimed that the settlement announcement jettisoned any P.A. return to peace talks. For its part, the United States has urged Jerusalem and Ramallah to hold off on unilateral acts – such as seeking unilateral statehood or new settlement activity – in the faint hope that direct, bilateral negotia- tions could resume, in keeping with the Oslo Accords, even though the Palestinians abrogated them by going to New York City rather than the eight miles to Netanyahu's office to talk. Ma'ale Adumim, four miles outside the current municipal borders of Jerusalem, achieved cityhood in 1991. It boasts 40,000 Israelis, hardly a renegade town. Planning new housing there isn't the issue. At issue is Israel's diplomatic blunder in causing the world to perceive the announce- ment as P.A. punishment for the UNGA vote. Yes, the P.A. has snubbed the peace process. But Jerusalem riled its Western supporters and lapsed in sustaining a higher moral standard than Ramallah by its hurried settlement announcement, which has become an international lightning rod instead of the reasoned plan it may well be. Meanwhile, international hypocrisy toward Israel is spiraling. The Assad regime in Iran-backed Syria is slaughtering its subjects, Iran relentlessly works toward an atomic bomb, and Hamas has cultivated the black art of mindlessly attacking Israelis. Yet the world seems more agitated about a government decision in Jerusalem to add housing in areas every prime minister since Yitzhak Rabin has asserted would be part of Israel in any final peace accord. The claim that Israeli housing within E-1 would cut off Palestinian popu- lation centers from each other in a future Palestinian state brushes off that Israel has built substantial infrastructure and bypass roads to con- nect parts of Jerusalem with parts of the West Bank without traversing the corridor, reports the Washington-based Israel Project. Israel couldn't overlook the provocative UNGA vote. Symbolic as it seemed, the vote elevated the PLO in its PR battle with archrival Hamas. More importantly, it cracked open a door through which the P.A. could charge Israeli leaders before the International Criminal Court as war criminals. Still, giving Zionist detractors PR ammunition because of yet another controversial settlement declaration strips Israel of more of its shredding diplomatic cloak. It would behoove Israel – more isolated than ever beyond the Jewish community, the U.S., Canada, parts of Europe and a few other brave nations – to search deep within its soul so government decisions don't come across as knee-jerk, while certainly not forgetting it sits in a unsta- ble region otherwise dominated by incitement, not rapprochement. ❑ December 27 • 2012 25