amily coups Roman Bonislawski of Ron and Roman Design, Jon Goldstein, managing partner, Maple Theater, and Greg Miracle of Great Lakes Coffee Company. T rust is an important value relationships or marriages. But casual that shapes who we become contact with a prior suitor can be mis- throughout our lives. A life interpreted, insinuating evidence of built on trust gives us confidence to untrustworthiness. Such assumptions take on new experiences. can degrade trust, which However, trust takes on dif- can affect intimacy and lead ferent forms when viewed to conflict or disaffection. over our lifespans. When an emotional alterca- The late psychologist tion occurs, it can take a Erik Erikson was the first to long time to reestablish the recognize that infants need broken trust. trust to develop positively. To rebuild a marriage A baby learns trust when and restore trust, both her needs are met, creat- spouses must work hard to ing an early sense of reas- jettison their suspicions so surance. It is her parents' that communication and Dan iel fundamental responsibility understanding can improve. Rosen baum, to engender trust. Doing This entails being honest PhD, LMSW so encourages the child with each other about feel- toward appropriate social ings, asking questions in adjustment; all other emotional inter- ways that alleviate apprehension and actions derive from this. refusing to replay problems, such as A trusting child will be inclined bringing up old arguments, people or to be friendly and interact well with events that trigger distrust. No one can others. Trust in oneself motivates a change what has already occurred; at child to strive to do well. Supported by best, the past can be used as a refer- teachers and other parent-like figures, ence to promote acceptable conduct. a child will also learn to gain the trust As one moves into life's later years, of others. loss of trust can be perplexing, par- To forge trust, parents need to make ticularly from someone in whom one reasonable demands that match their has previously confided. Friends fall child's age and ability. Teaching your away. A trusted spouse may no lon- child to be potty trained or to dress ger be able to function effectively or himself without pressure builds his provide adequate support. Children self-trust. As your child becomes capa- may be distant both in miles and emo- ble of judging whom or what to trust tion. The resulting loss of trust can be correctly, you will feel comfortable exacerbated by feelings of loneliness or putting your child into situations that abandonment. will invoke mutual trust and increase Replaying the loss of trust first individual gratification. felt in childhood can be disturbing, When your child advances into particularly if mistrust has been a life- adolescence, you can expect he or long pattern. Over time, subsequent she will break away from parents doubt can develop into distrust of and seek trust more from peers. medical personnel, friends, relatives, Trust in the teen years can be elusive colleagues or clergy, all of whom just because allegiances change in a flash. want to help. These advocates will Uncertainties in trust occur when need to renew their resolve to create rumors and belittling remarks chal- an environment of trust for loved ones lenge even the well-adjusted teen. who resist their efforts. "Once burned, twice wary" is a com- No matter what the age or upbring- mon, if unstated, creed at this age, ing, trust is essential for a satisfying though it can take a number of inci- life. Trust me on this. ❑ dences for trust to be disturbed. By adulthood, Erikson explains that Dr. Daniel Rosenbaum is a clinical social trust is satisfied through intimacy, worker at Counseling Associates Inc. a crucial aspect of a good marriage. in West Bloomfield, where he counsels Since the 1960s, our social mores children, teens and adults experiencing have changed, so now it is acceptable family or personal psychological problems. for our spouses to have had previous Reach him at (248) 626-1500. 30 November 1 • 2012 114 It's Back! Updated Maple Theater re-opens with new concessions, roomier seating. Ronelle Grier Contributing Writer A fter several months of extensive renovation, the Maple Theater is back, with larger screens, roomier seats and aisles, and a redesigned lobby featuring a cozy fireplace and new concessions where patrons can relax with a locally brewed beer or gour- met coffee creation. A longtime local favorite for art and mainstream films, the Bloomfield Township theater re- opens on Thursday, Nov. 1, with a benefit for Variety — the Children's Charity, featuring an exclusive pre- view showing of The Sessions, star- ring Helen Hunt and John Hawkes. The grand opening weekend con- tinues with additional showings of The Sessions along with another new film, The Other Son, a moving story about two very different Middle Eastern families, one Jewish and one Palestinian, whose worlds are turned upside down when they discover their sons were switched at birth. Previously known as the Maple Art Theater, the name was changed when Cloud Nine Theater Partners, a Michigan-based company led by Jon and Lauren Goldstein of Bloomfield Hills, took over owner- ship of the theater last February. Cloud Nine is an offshoot of Highline Investments, a company with multiple theater interests across the country. According to Jon, the renovations were intended to provide a more upscale environment while retaining the original charm that made the theater a favorite for almost four decades. "We made a conscious effort to maintain the essence of what the Maple Theater was: a local neigh- borhood joint," said Goldstein. All three movie theaters, which seat a total of 700, have been reno- vated to include larger screens, more legroom and wider aisles. Each the- ater also features two rows of special Club Seating with tables and access to wait service for food and drinks. New additions to the redesigned and enlarged lobby are the Maple Bar, which offers an array of spirits as well as a variety of Michigan- based beer and wine selections, and the Great Lakes Coffee Roasting Company cafe. A new dining con- cession, American Tapas by Chef Kelli Lewton, will be open soon. "We've designed the new Maple Theater to offer an upscale movie- going experience for the local neigh- borhood and cinephiles all across Metro Detroit," said Goldstein, who will also feature screenings of operas, Broadway shows, concerts and popular television shows. Other special events include the return of "Secret Cinema," where moviego- ers are surprised by a classic movie introduced by a local guest curator. "The most frequent question peo- ple ask is Are you still going to show the same movies?"' said Goldstein. "That's a tough question. We want to show good movies. We want to be known as a curator of content, not an art or foreign film house." Goldstein plans to use the the- ater's newly designed website, along with Facebook and Twitter, to engage the local community. An example is a new website section called "Why We Chose This Film." Three new loyalty packages will be offered: a complimentary Maple Rewards program as well as two Maple Club programs, which pro- vide members with special seating and other perks for an annual fee. For newsletter sign-up, online tickets, or other information, visit www.TheMapleTheater.com. For a preview of the film The Sessions, see page 72.