ave you heard of the
Paraprosdokians? No, they
are not the latest family to
be exposed on a reality show. Nor
are they a sumptuous appetizer in an
exotic restaurant. They are figures
of speech in which the latter part of
or phrase is
are some of the
delights that I
have come up
with and some
that are currently
making the rounds on the Internet.
After reading them, try your hand at
creating some; they are as much fun to
come up with as to read.
• If it ain't broke, the warranty is not
• Where there is a
will, there are rela-
• If it sounds too
good to be true, just
take it and run.
• If I agreed with
you, we'd both be
• Because light travels
faster than sound, some
people appear bright until
you hear them speak.
• Candidates run for
office; and once in, they become couch
• We never really grow up; we only
learn how to act in public.
• Knowledge is knowing a tomato is
a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a
. Newscasters often begin with
"Good evening" and proceed to tell you
why it isn't.
• A clear conscience is the sign of a
• You are never too old to learn
• Do not argue
with an idiot;
he will drag you
to his level and
beat you with
• How is it
that one careless
match can start
a forest fire, but it
takes a whole box
to start a campfire?
• Dolphins are so
smart that within a
few weeks of captivity they can train
people to stand on the edge of the pool
and throw them fish.
• Some folks bring happiness wher-
ever they go. Some, whenever they go.
• Some people hear voices. Some see
invisible people. Some have no imagi-
nation at all.
For those of you who think that
this column is way off the mark, just
remember that the sure way to hit a
target is to shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
Stay in touch. Add your insight. Be informed. Go to thejewishnews.com .
it ousso G
Aug. 23-29, 2012
Matt Prentice is
pleased to annoutice4
the debut ofi
On August 31s !
is a family
high flavor value
cuts of USDA
Prime Beef &
other meats with
5-11 Elul 5772 I Vol. CXLII, No. 3
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