Parshat
Chukat:
Numbers 19:1-
22:1; Judges
11:1-11:33.
A
chukah, the sages tell us, is
a statute or law that is unex-
plainable in itself, even unrea-
sonable. Accepting our mortality is the
ultimate chukah — the final unreason-
able and unquestioned statute that we
must obey.
In this week's Torah read-
ing, we encounter the deaths
of both Miriam and Aaron.
What do we learn about
our own response to death
through the narrative of this
double tragedy in the life of
Am Yisrael?
When Miriam dies, the
people complain that there
is no water left for them. The
Torah surprisingly describes
neither official mourning
period nor practice in her memory. But
the Midrash reminds us that as long as
she was alive, Miriam represented and
provided a "Well of Living Waters."
Her kindness and her nurturing were
sources of sustenance and comfort.
After her sudden death, the Israelites
cried to Moses to restore to them the
moisture of Miriam's care, not just to
quench their thirst. But the "Well" of
Miriam's water closed up, shocked there
was no grief displayed and no tears
shed for her.
God compassionately intervened,
telling Moses to speak to the very rock
that was the source of Miriam's well. But
Moses strikes the rock (twice) instead
— out of his own grief, perhaps? Or was
Moses angry with the people who would
not even give him and Aaron the courtesy
of a moment's peace to grieve? Or was he
feeling guilty for all the times he meant
to tell her that he loved her, and didn't?
What do we learn from the stories of
Miriam's passing in the Torah, and from
the responses to her death? I note four
quite evident characteristics that blend
into the rabbis' portrait of her life as a
source of living water for the people of
Israel:
She is a caregiver, standing by to
watch as an Egyptian princess draws
her younger brother, Moses, from the
water. She arranges for a nursemaid for
the boy — their own mother, we are
told — and later serves as a role model
as he re-learns his Israelite heritage.
She takes timbrel in hand to sing and
lead the dancing at the moment of her
people's greatest joy: the Crossing of the
Sea of Reeds. She celebrates the human
experience, and especially composes the
words and music that enhance her fam-
ily's happy events.
She is critical of Moses' faults, and
cannot resist trying to help him make
the correct choices. She
speaks her mind, especially in
light of what she perceives as
an injustice with the Kushite
woman whom her brother
marries. Tradition warns of
the gossip, if not outright
prejudice that might have
been Miriam's motivation;
but tradition also notes that
it would have been a worse
sin for her to remain indiffer-
ent and silent if she felt that
Moses was in error.
And the final characteristic of
Miriam's life was her mere presence. She
was reliable and trusted. When she died,
she was truly missed. When she died,
it was noticeable — something critical
and vital in the community's life was
different, and the people were upset,
"thirsty" for her voice and her music
and her nourishment.
Later in the same chapter, Aaron, the
high priest, the peacemaker and peace-
lover, joins Miriam in death, and the
people are numb. But Aaron (with Moses'
help) had prepared for his death, training
his sons (even in light of their own per-
sonal tragedy) and sharing the responsi-
bilities and blessings of priesthood with
them. One by one, the Israelites' leaders
are taken from them, and they develop a
response for life: mourning for 30 days,
distinguishing between pure and impure,
affirming the importance of memory.
So this is our Torah: The stories we
tell and the customs we practice, gen-
eration to generation, form our human
answer to the chukah of human mortal-
ity. Every time we sing Miriam's words,
every time we hear Aaron's priestly
benediction, (every time we see a smile
on the face of a critically ill child who
has been given new hope), we remind
ourselves of their lives and gifts to us.
This commentary on mourning was
written in memory of Murray J. Grant
— dreamer, visionary, devoted lover of
Israel, nurturer of burdened souls and
dear friend.
❑
Norman T. Roman is a rabbi at Temple Kol
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