ETCETERA THE GINA MONOLOGUES It's Your Independence Day, Baby! How to dump a jerk in time for the Fourth of July. By Gina Volpe he Fourth of July is nigh, which means it's the season for pounding back hot dogs, boozing on boats and celebrating the spirit of Independence Day by dumping your crappy boyfriend (or girlfriend) and rolling solo. Still, it can be difficult to put the kibosh on a dead relationship, especially when the other person is really good at mowing the lawn — and you get anxiety at the thought of dating again. Fret not, loves, because I've blown through enough rotten romances to compile this handy list of the best ways to shake off a bad relationship — like a flea. T , Quit that mess cold turkey. Breakups should be like tearing off a Band-Aid: quick, painless and, hopefully, done without ripping out any hair. People often make the mistake of staying connected on Facebook or keeping the ex's number saved. However, moving on requires having the dignity and self- esteem necessary to attract a plethora of rebound hookups. After all, you've got some catching up to do! Delete the ex from your life so you can finally focus on what's most important: Kissing people you actually like. Tie up loose ends before doing the deed. Nothing can put a dark cloud over a holiday weekend like realizing mid-burger that your ex — whom you just erased from every social network, phone and buddy list — still has your 1996 No Doubt concert T-shirt or favorite toenail clippers. It's much easier to replace a boyfriend or girlfriend than it is your vintage copy of the Thriller album, so handle this business with care. You can either let it go, and thus part with a cherished treasure, or stoop to asking for the item back and run the risk of your ex having used it for taking care of certain bodily functions. (Warning:This is a legitimate possibility, as I can attest!) here simply isn't another restaurant in the area that can boast the offering of a more abundant array of fresh fish and pristine seafood flown in daily from around>the world. Don't try to be friends in an attempt to alleviate your"Dumper's Guilt." Nobody who has recently been dumped accepts an offer of friendship without hoping it will turn back into a relationship, and then doing annoying things to try to make that happen. Nothing can turn a dumper's bored indifference to burning hatred faster than a few weeks of being "friends." You'll check your phone, hoping the latest text is from your rebound babe, but see a "friendly" message from your buzzkill ex. You'll say to yourself, "Ugh, didn't I get rid of you?" but then remember you're now obligated as a "friend"to be nice instead of saying, "BUZZ OFF!" like you want to do. Your resentment will build until finally you snap and cut ties — like you should have done all along — but now you'll have to find something to do with the creepy John Mayer and Michael Buble CDs he left in your mailbox as a "friendly" gesture. Landlubbers will find plenty to enjoy too including fresh poultry, premium aged cuts of beef and lamb chops. Tim- "Many folks still look back wistfully on those glory days of Joe Muer Seafood in Detroit, and with good reason... (the) Detroit Seafood Market can fill the seemingly lacking void of this fine seafood dining institution." ing is key. Are you worried the dumpee might take the news badly and try to murder you or, worse, "talk"? Do you have Fourth of July plans that involve being at a remote cottage with no cell phone service? If so, do your dumping right before and then escape to the cot- tage while everything blows over. Attention spans are short these days (thanks, Twitter!) so the poor chump will prob- ably forget about it by the time you return. If, however, the soon-to-be-dumped has a cool boat or cabin, or mad grilling skills, obviously wait until after the weekend has passed so you can still get in on that. From munching on burgers to water skiing to pop- ping illegal fireworks, there is simply too much fun to be had over the Fourth of July weekend to leave room for a bad relationship. Let the spirit of Independence Day inspire you with the courage to break free of your relationship shackles and be reborn as an independent singleton, like the Founding Fathers would have wanted. CULINARY QUICKSTEP Danny Raskin - Jewish News ••• ■ Ow PIO M. AM London Broil with Rosemary &&LUNCH espite its fancy sounding name, this dish is easy to pre- pare and cooks in less than 30 minutes.The London broil cut is lean, so there is little fat or grizzle to contend with. You gotta like that. Pair with a green salad and some mini roasted potatoes and — voila! — instant dinner. The biggest time-consumer here is the wait time that is recommended between prep and cooking (3 hours to overnight). D I Please present this coupon prior to placing your order and receive a free lunch entrée with the purchase of another lunch entrée of equal or greater value. Offer good Monday through Friday. Offer not valid in conjunction with other promotional discounts. Offer expires July 31, 2011 Deir6(d Sat I Offer good seven days a week. Offer not valid in =junction with other promotional discounts. Offer expires July 31, 2011 Debv-d /140- 1435 Randolph St. • Detroit • 313.962.4180 • (Located in Paradise Valley) • thecletroitseafoodmarkeLcom Directions Put the meat in a seal-tight plastic bag. Combine the olive oil, soy sauce, brown sugar, rosemary, pepper, salt and garlic. Seal and toss to coat. Place the meat in the refrigerator for at least 3 hours; remove and let stand, at room tempera- ture, for 30 minutes. Preheat the grill to medium-hot or set your oven to broil. Remove the meat from the bag but save the marinade for basting. Grill or broil, basting liberally, for 10 minutes on each side (for medium-rare) or longer, depend- ing on how you like it cooked. Place the meat on a cutting board and let your masterpiece stand for 5 minutes. Cut against the grain into thin strips. 2 1/2 pounds London broil 1 t-/--&IDINN ER Please , present this coupon prior to placing your order and receive a free dinner entree with the purchase of another dinner entrée of equal or greater value. /2 cup olive oil /2 cup low-sodium soy sauce 1 /4 cup light brown sugar 3 Tbsp. coarsely chopped fresh rosemary (or 1 Tbsp. dried rosemary) 1 1/2 Tbsp. coarsely ground pepper 1 tsp. sea salt 6 cloves of garlic, minced Ingredients 1435 Randolph St. • Detroit • 313.9624180 •