Metro Emotional Sobriety Dec. 23 event to discuss finding peace in your way of life. I Ronelle Grier Special to the Jewish News f problems with children, parents, health issues, bosses, co-workers or finances make it difficult to stay happy and calm, "emotional sobriety" may be the solution. Author and Jewish mysticism expert Tim "111.111 1 r 111 "" 1 GET LOST. Friday Night Live!: Check out performances by one of the founders of Latin Jazz–violinist Alfredo de la Fe. Family Sunday: Tonga Dallas brings the seven principles of Kwanzaa to life through stories filled with fun, excitement and humor. Now on View: Fakes, Forgeries and Mysteries Inc ei1"!1 Programs are rnaoe posatte ;MU support horn the Li:dor/an Council for f an,J CNitura! D A 5200 Woodward Ave. 14 313-833-79001 DETROIT INSTITUTE OF ARTS Rabbi Shais Taub will explain this innovative concept in a lec- ture,"Emotional Sobriety: How to Remain Reasonably Happy and Calm While People Around You are Acting Insane." The event, at 7 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 23, at The Shul in West Bloomfield, is spon- sored by Jerry and Gail Beale of West Bloomfield in honor of the first yahrtzeit of their son Steven. Co-sponsors are Rabbi Taub the Daniel B. Sobel Friendship House and The Shul. According to Taub, who wrote the book God of Our Understanding: Jewish Spirituality and Recovery from Addiction (Ktav Publishing House), emotional sobriety does not pertain to problems with alcohol. It is a way of life based on spirituality that applies to anyone who wants to face challenges with- out sacrificing inner peace and happiness. "When we talk about sobriety and recov- ery, what we really mean is finding a more effective way to live by letting go of things we can't control': said Taub. Rabbi Yisrael Pinson is director of the West Bloomfield-based Daniel B. Sobel Friendship House, which provides Jewish recovery and support programs for individu- als and families struggling with addiction or other isolating conditions. Pinson believes that Taub's message has relevance for all members of the community. "You don't have to be an addict to benefit from the concepts of recovery and spiritual- ity": said Pinson."It's about learning how to live a serene life." Taub will offer practical advice for achiev- ing emotional sobriety, including how to discern which situations require action and which are beyond one's control. He will address issues such as know- ing how to recognize when a situation or relationship has hit a dead-end, how to let go and move on, and how to distinguish manipulation from helpfulness. "Sanity is 'letting go and letting God:" said Taub. "Insanity is wasting our energies on emotional black holes, such as trying to please a boss who is never satisfied or pursu- ing a relationship with someone who is just not interested:' According to Taub, the relationship one develops and maintains with God is one of the keys to achieving emotional sobriety "How does a regular person develop a meaningful relationship with God, a rela- tionship that's real enough to actually grant emotional relief?" he asked. Taub's book presents a view of addiction and recovery that is different from many tra- ditional works on the subject. He contends that traditional treatment models focus on eliminating the chemical dependence or CODI our Underkandin8 Jemer, Stantaallty and Recovery from At:Ithaca, Rabb •lais Taub behavior instead of addressing the real prob- lem — the addiction. "Using does not;cause addiction," he said. "Addiction causes using:' He said a person does not become addict- ed from using a substance; rather, being an addict causes someone to use drugs or engage in compulsive, self-destructive behaviors such as gambling or overeating. He described addiction as an "incurable, progressive and bewildering malady" that is completely treatable. Taub, who has worked extensively in the field of addiction and recovery, said his book is based on human experience rather than theory "I didn't write anything that I haverit seen work for someone else or that I haven't tested myself,' said Taub, who moved this year from Milwaukee to Pittsburgh, where he lives with his wife, Brocha, and their children. The drugs are not the addict's problem; they are his solution. His book addresses the significant role that a relationship with a higher power plays in recovery. "The addict's drug of choice serves a crucial function," he said. "It allows him to live, just as food and water do for a normal person. If you take away the addict's solu- tion without replacing it, he will go back to the only solution he knows — his drug of choice Taub agrees with Pinson that the basic tenets of recovery, induding 12 step pro- grams, can also benefit those within the general community "All of us have at least a little bit of dys- function, chaos and pain in our lives": he said. "We all try to play God and take too much responsibility for things that are beyond our contront's a universal problem. The same solution that works for addicts works for everyone' - ❑ The Shul-Jack & Miriam Shenkman Building is at 6890 W. Maple Road in West Bloomfield. The Dec. 23 lecture is free. For more information, call Friendship House, (248) 788-8888. December 16 2010 ,, ,, a rt s . .,"AlLVIA *:%%%%1..= " " ♦ • ai ltillaaammiagii