Arts & Entertainment

Author-Dads Share
Powerful Messages

Suzanne Chessler
Special to the Jewish News

B

nice Feller labels himself an
experientialist.
His writing career has been
propelled by his experiences.
Feller walked through the Middle East
to write about the Bible, and he joined the
circus to write about being
a down.
When a routine blood
test led to the shocking
discovery that Feller had
bone cancer, he wrote about
that, too, but he focused on
a coping mechanism that he
suggests to others.
The approach is
described in The Council
of Dads (HarperCollins;
$22.99) and will be explored
on a TV program, Dads for
My Daughters, to be aired
four times on CNN over
Father's Day weekend.
Feller, through both text and TV gives
insight into his battle with disease, his
return to good health and his request of
six friends to assume fathering roles for his
twin daughters.
Dads for My Daughters will be broadcast
7 and 10 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, June
19-20. Dr. Sanjay Gupta hosts the docu-
mentary.
"I feel that my book is a guide for living
for my daughters and anybody else who
wants to come along": says Feller, 45, who
spent a year undergoing chemotherapy
and surgery."Fortunately, that's turning out
to be a lot of people.
"I feel I have a treasury of wisdom from
most of the meaningful people in my life
— the six men in the Council of Dads, my
dad, my grandfathers — with a few bits
of wisdom of my own thrown in for good
measure:'
Feller's twins were 3 years old when

he was diagnosed in 2008, and the writer
looked to friends who could offer specific
insights for the girls if they had to grow up
without him.
While childhood chum Ben Edwards
would convey the importance of holding
on to a sense of youth,Yak roommate Max
Stier had a message about following one's
interests, and agent David Black would
know about facing obstacles.
Joshua Cooper Ramo,
introduced through a
global business confer-
ence, would stress the
brilliance of everyday
experiences. Fellow
writer Ben Sherwood
could inspire ideas of
living through life's
questions. Travel guide
Jeff Shumlin would be
about making connec-
tions.
"I've written nine
books, and this was,
by far, the easiest to
write: says Feller, who
has discussed earlier projects at the Jewish
Community Center in West Bloomfield.
"While this book was very personal and
emotional, I knew exactly the people for
whom I was writing it and why I was doing
it. The other books took me three years.
This book took me three months, and it fell
off my fingers:"
Feller, a history major at Yale who had
grown up in Savannah, went to Japan for
his junior year and wrote copious letters
home. After returning, people talked about
his letters, and that encouraged his writing
career.
Earlier books include Looking for Class,
about a year at Oxford and Cambridge;
Dreaming Out Loud, about country music
stars; and Where God Was Born, about the
cultures of the Middle East.
"In 1998, I had the idea to retrace the
Bible because I hadn't read the Bible since I

Providing on page 45

Suzanne Chessler
Special to the Jewish News

mentoring, a former chum to be repaid $600
borrowed for traveling and a former baseball
buddy to extend belated sympathy on the
loss of a daughter.
"I thought of this as a very Jewish under-
rofessional commitments long had
taking': says Kravitz, married by the late
steered Lee Kravitz — until he was
Rabbi Sherwin Wine. "Making amends is
fired as editor in chief of Parade
part of every religion, but it's very key to the
magazine in 2007. The work direction of his
Jewish religion. We do it on Yom Kippur.
life would have to change, but not before he
"When we make amends to others, we
embarked on a yearlong detour.
have to do it directly and
Kravitz, taking stock of
sincerely, and it has to be
his choices while survey- El-
accepted. Thafs the hard
ing mementoes that had .1
work of doing business. I
been packed away at the 1
did a lot of hard work that
office, made a personal ;
year in terms of reaching
commitment to reconnect it
out and having all the time
with people important
with peopl'
from his past. There were
Kravitz had the idea for
some amends he wanted to
the
book after visiting his
make as he moved through
aunt
and realizing what the
his mid-50s.
experience
meant to him.
The displaced editor
"I
thought
if I could get
started out by visiting an
someone
to
support
me
aunt estranged from fam-
in
the
project,
meaning
a
ily and placed in a care
book
contract,
then
I
would
facility because of mental
have more resources to go
illness. The two bonded
on
these
journeys,"
he says. "It would be help-
immediately.
ful
to
other
people
if
I shared my stories.
The satisfying effects of that reunion,
"I
wrote
a
book
proposal
while I was in
and the resulting reunion of the aunt with
the
process
of
going
on
the
journeys.
Even
other relatives, led to a firm list of nine more
if
the
book
never
sold,
I
would
have
kept
on
people Kravitz was interested in finding and
going
because
each
encounter
was
so
com-
a book about his quest, Unfinished Business:
One Man's Extraordinary Year of Trying to Do pelling:'
Because of the Internet, Kravitz did not
the Right Things (Bloomsbury; $25).
have
any difficulties in tracking down the
"The encounter with my aunt was really
people
he wanted to see. He gives advice
powerful," says Kravitz, whose parents, Phyllis
about
this
kind of pursuit on his website,
and Harry Kravitz, have lived in Southfield
.
www.myunfinishedbusiness.com
and whose wife, literary agent Elizabeth
"People
can
go
on
these
journeys
in small
Kaplan, grew up in Oakland County "There
ways
every
day'
he
says.
"Ifs
about
taking
was a particular moment that compelled me
stock of our lives, stepping back and telling
to go on with other journeys.
the
people who matter what they mean to
"When I first visited my aunt, I didn't
us"
know if she would even remember me, but it
Kravitz said not much money was
was so profound when we hugged each other.
involved
in seeing people in person. While
I felt that again I was an empathetic, sensi-
there
were
some transportation expenses,
tive person:'
Kravitz decided to connect with a former
teacher he wanted to thank for significant
Reconnecting on page 45

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June 17 • 2010

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