ifi o ltE6iV(Al ' y S
starring
into their places of worship and their
public and private conversations.
She had no problem finding women
to interview; she went to conferences,
made connections, and then was
linked to other women. "Dissatisfied
people she notes, "want to talk."
She found that the Muslim women
in particular wanted to be heard, and
appreciated the opportunity to talk
to someone who would listen to them
respectfully and without judgment.
Frequently, the curiosity was recip-
rocal. She noticed that people who
are devout want to know about other
faiths. In fact, some of her subjects
hadn't spoken to anyone Jewish before.
Muslim women talked to her
about their longings for and efforts
at women-led prayer, and also about
their frustrations with having to
enter their places of worship through
a back door; one woman told of hear-
ing a visiting imam preach about the
permissibility of wife beating.
These women understood, as one
told Tanenbaum, "that we have lay-
ers to peel back before we can figure
out how Islam can be just to women:'
and are confident that the egalitarian
impulse and gender justice are there,
within Islam.
They also spoke candidly about
how they feel about covering them-
selves with the traditional hijab.
"The main thing I learned is
that they see it as their choice
Tanenbaum says. "If they wear it, it
doesn't mean they are oppressed.
Many Muslim women want to dress
in a way that makes them feel close
to their God." She adds that a lot of
them are perplexed and disturbed
that it's seen as a sign of oppression.
Tanenbaum, who hadn't been
to a Muslim prayer service before
beginning this project, visited sev-
eral mosques, including the Islamic
Cultural Center on the Upper East
Side, where one of the imams was her
guide. She found the services to be
very beautiful and physical, with the
women behind a curtain, performing
identical actions to the men.
One of the very moving experi-
ences she had during her research
was to attend a communion service
presided over by a Catholic woman
priest, with several hundred people
in attendance.
She reports that more than 60
Catholic women have been illicitly
ordained as priests and deacons in
the United States. Although they are
not recognized by the Vatican and
can't serve congregations, they hold
services in homes and private places.
She found that some of the most
radical feminist Catholics today are
nuns.
Tanenbaum's chapters on Jewish
women are incisive, providing some
of the best concise explanations
of Jewish rituals and practice, and
Orthodox feminists' perspectives.
Hearing story after story of women
who feel left out, or treated like sec-
ond-class citizens, or simply ignored
by a tradition they crave to be a
part of, readers might wonder why
these women don't walk out, or find
a denomination or place of worship
more akin with their attitudes toward
equality.
"If you're dealing with someone
with very strong beliefs about God
and how to serve God',' Tanenbaum
explains, "it's not so easy to just go
somewhere else. They take their faith
very seriously and don't want to give
up on their core beliefs, what keeps
them going." The prevailing attitude
is that if something is broken, don't
leave the broken thing and find
something else — fix it.
Across faiths, she sees women
involved in serious study of religious
texts, often at the same level as men.
She's hopeful that with more educa-
tion, women will be able to take on
more leadership roles.
Tanenbaum is the author of Slut!
Growing Up Female with a Bad
Reputation and Catfight: Rivalries
Among Women — Diets to Dating,
from the Boardroom to the Delivery
Room.
"I'm very interested in girls' and
women's lives, and I want to help
girls and women make sense of how
they are socialized to make certain
choices. From that point of view,
this is a continuation of my first two
books."
She sees her work as conscious-
ness-raising in book form. In her
next book, she hopes to look at
devout gays and lesbians.
Books change their writers as well
as their readers, and Tanenbaum
admits that writing this book broad-
ened her outlook.
"I understand Islam, in particular,
in a way that I didn't before she says,
expressing gratitude for the oppor-
tunity to meet progressive, non-
fundamentalist people who are very
devout. When she hears people in her
community equating Islam with fun-
damentalist Islam, she tries to point
out that there's a whole other world
of Islam they should know about. T1
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