The Hebrew Benevolent Society
(Chesed Shel Emes) will hold
MEMORIAL DAY SERVICES
IN ERFAITH
Sunday, May 24 at 1 2:30 p.m.
at the Veterans Section of their cemetery
HEBREW MEMORIAL PARK
Gratiot Avenue at 14 Mile Road
with the participation of
Jewish War Veterans Dept. of Michigan and Ladies Auxiliary.
Families, Relatives and Friends are invited to attend.
Ann Arbor
T
he preparation for our bat
mitzvah is nearing comple-
tion. I say "our" because,
with details that rival any state din-
ner at the White House, it sure seems
like our whole family has a stake in
our daughter Gabbi's big day.
There are just a few
weeks left to go, but every-
thing is still a work in prog-
ress. Forget about the party
planning. Is Gabbi ready for
her part in the service? Is
she ready to become an
adult in Judaism's eyes?
Sure, we have yet to nail
down the final number of
attendees, the last couple
of menu items, the T-shirt
design and what tie I'm
going to wear. However,
Gabbi hasn't finished her own
preparations. She's close. I think
she's learned her Torah portion and
her haftorah. She chants very well
(but then again, don't ask me — I'm
Protestant and have little experience
from which to draw).
One area that I do know something
about is writing. And this I can say
with confidence: Gabbi needs to
finish writing her speech. It's still a
work in progress. She's been typing
away on the computer and confer-
ring with Rabbi Levy; however, it still
requires a bit more body, editing and
refining. I know she understands the
meaning of her Torah portion — it's
just a matter of putting it all into her
own words and how she relates the
message to life in her world today.
Don't get me wrong, though. I credit
Gabbi with having done a lot of work
on her bat mitzvah overall. She is
taking it seriously and doesn't com-
plain ... much.
Despite her progress, I sometimes
wonder if Judaism got it right? Will
our daughter be ready to chant in a
foreign language to a room full of
people (including her entire sev-
enth-grade class)? I know what my
singing sounded like during puberty.
Fortunately, she's not going through
the same frog-like stage that I did.
More importantly, is Gabbi ready
to take on the responsibilities that
Judaism asks of her? Is she going to
contribute meaningfully to temple
life? To society? Is she ready to per-
form mitzvot? As my wife, Bonnie,
and I try to figure out how to parent
our way through the adolescent years,
we chuckle a bit and say,"Hmmm."
That is, sometimes we think the
maturity is a long time
coming, and sometimes we
see Gabbi perform with the
grace and poise of Princess
Diana.
Bonnie often says that
she sees a big neon sign
above Gabbi's head that
reads: Work in Progress. I
don't know what my wife
has been eating to cause
her to have these hallucina-
tions, but I think I under-
stand the general idea.
Right before Passover, Gabbi spent all
her allowance money on chocolate,
pretzels and lip-gloss at the mall.
Then, just a few days later, came this
sudden flash of maturity and com-
passion. During the second seder, her
grandmother (who had just lost her
mother) was telling us about a new
charitable foundation she's starting
that would provide therapy dogs to
nursing homes. Gabbi piped up, "I'll
be happy to donate some of my bat
mitzvah money to that" These words
were a comforting ray of sunshine to
her grandmother.
As I looked at our daughter with
admiration (if not a bit of shock),
this neon glow started to material-
ize above her head. Maybe it was
the Manischewitz, but suddenly I
saw these words: Making Progress. I
have a feeling that, in a few weeks on
the bimah, another sign will glow:
Introducing Gabbi 2.0. El
Jim Keen is author of the book "Inside
Intermarriage: A Christian Partner's
Perspective on Raising a Jewish Family"
(URJ Press, forthcoming) and a con-
tributor to the book "The Guide to
the Jewish Interfaith Family Life: an
lnterfaithFamily.com Handbook" (Jewish
Lights publishing). He is a columnist for
lnterfaithFamily.com . His e-mail address
is jckeen®umich.edu.
GERALD ORDER
MYRA GROSS
J.W.V. Dept Commander
J.W. V.A. President
RABBI BORUCH E. LEVIN
RABBI JOSEPH HIRSCH
H.B.S. Executive Director
H.B.S. President
1509980
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May 21 • 2009
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