Editor's Letter
Hospice And
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"No one is ever prepared for the end of life. We are fortunate our volunteers, spiritual caregivers, medical partners and donors
have come together to help our community's most vulnerable members and their loved ones when they need it most."
- David Techner, president
Jewish Hospice & Chaplaincy Network
A
t death's door, renowned pediatric nephrologist
Dr. Alan Gruskin knocked on his terms, thanks to
hospice. His is a powerful story about coping and
connecting — and dying with dignity.
He died on April 7, 2003 — six years ago this week. He was
just 65. His dreams of a yearlong sabbatical in Europe were
shattered when he learned he had pancreatic cancer, one of
the more aggressive forms of the scary disease.
The day before an oncologist told
her husband the gravity of his prog-
nosis — "Go home and plan your
funeral" — Renee Gruskin, a tower
of determination, told the doctor:
"Whatever you do, don't say anything
that will make him lose all hope."
The oncologist didn't listen.
I was deeply moved by Dr. Gruskin's
heartrending story in the 2007-
2008 issue of the Jewish Hospice &
Chaplaincy Network's Hospice Heroes
Make Life Better magazine. I was
moved again by the IN's April 2 account of his wife's role at the
March 19 JHCN forum, "The War On Pain." Before an attentive
audience, she described how hospice
provided the warmth, comfort and med-
ications so necessary for her husband to
live out his life with his humility intact.
I wanted to learn more about this
brave man who loved playing the piano
for hospitalized kids — and his amazing
wife who adopted the cause of hospice
as her own. I wanted to share more of
his story as JHCN marks its 10th year of
service to the entire Jewish community
in hopes that IN readers might consider
the cause as well either as contributors
or volunteers.
oned with in the orbit of end-of-life care.
In the Hospice Heroes article, the West Bloomfield resident
recalled how the oncologist's dark prognosis, in lieu of hos-
pice's potential benefits, devastated her husband. "He sat up in
a chair all night, every night, afraid to sleep," Renee said. "Alan
felt angry, cheated. It terrified me to see him sitting on his
lounge chair wasting away. The sun would set, and he would
set with
Unaware of options like hospice, Renee drifted and was "in
tears every night."
fro
The Impact
Enter Jewish Hospice & Chaplaincy Network on a friend's
recommendation. "It was a godsend to Alan and me as he was
submerged in a sea of fear;' Renee told me last week.
Rabbi Freedman's uplifting staff includes patient coordina-
tor Nathan Shiovitz, who I went to high school with in Detroit
and who is so compassionate with the patients. He's truly
honored to work with them.
The entire JHCN staff brought a sense of calm, consistency
and caring into the Gruskins' home — and a lesson in bet-
ter understanding death as part of the life cycle. Here's how
Renee put it: "They brought us the medications that helped
manage Alan's overwhelming psychic
fears and emotions as well as the physi-
cal pain and problems."
They also grasped family concerns.
Against a backdrop of CDs of Alan's
concert-style piano music playing,
Rabbi Freedman talked to Alan about
sports, music and family He also recon-
nected Alan with Rabbi Harold Loss
of Temple Israel in West Bloomfield.
Together, Alan and Rabbi Loss contem-
plated the immortality of the human
spirit.
"Frankly, as a caregiver during that
period of my life Renee said, "I feel the
The Power
hospice staff saved me from having a
Let's be candid: No one knows how to
breakdown from physical and mental
Dr. Alan Gruskin fo and a calming
die — we can only guess at it. But the
exhaustion."
influence in hospic e.
journey can be less daunting with hos-
If that's not a lock-tight testimonial
pice.
for the role of hospice, I don't know what
To know the Jewish Hospice & Chaplaincy Network and its
would be. It captures what hospice can do by tapping into
inspirational executive director Rabbi E.B."Bunny" Freedman
something as basic as human connections.
is to know the essence of improving life at its most vulnerable
Alan calmed down in the presence of hospice and its nur-
stage. No matter how sick you are, West Bloomfield-based
turing, respectful ways. He became more accepting of his fate.
JHCN and its compassionate embrace elevates how you think
Renee was settled as long as he was calm.
of yourself in this image-crazy world.
Before the fateful prognosis, Renee knew Alan's cancer was
The Outreach
worsening. He had lost a lot of weight and the chemotherapy
At Rabbi Freedman's urging after Alan died, Renee decided to
was ineffective. "But Alan still had a glimmer of hope," Renee
rally for change and move hospice front and center as a main-
said. "And I didn't want to take that away from him."
Today, Renee is a JHCN volunteer — and a force to be reck-
Hospice on page A6
? 1"...
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