Spirituality

TORAH PORTION

Overcoming Hatred

Shabbat Vayetze: Genesis 28:10-32:3;
Hosea 12:13-14:10.

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ne need only spend a short
curities and confronting us with
time on the schoolyard
what we like least about ourselves.
watching children play
Hatred is no doubt a destructive
before seeing a disagreement break
emotion that can quickly and easily
out followed by "I hate you:' three
get out of control. Sadly, we live in a
stinging words that are so frequently
society filled with hatred — a world
uttered.
of unyielding prejudice, bigotry, rac-
Hate is a very strong feeling and
ism, sexism, homophobia, etc. It is
most parents cringe when they hear
this unfounded hatred that so often
their children speak the "h"
leads to condemnation of
word. Growing up, I heard
individuals and violence
my mom and dad say: "You
against groups of people.
can dislike intensely, but
The Torah portion this
you must never hate!" It is
week begs us to recognize
an important life lesson that
that the ultimate test of
I have not forgotten to this
our own humanity is how
day.
we get beyond our feelings
In the Torah, there are
of hatred for one another
many situations where one
while shifting our focus to
might expect to see true
a vision of what is possible
Rabbi Joseph
hatred. Cain must have
and what can be. In our
H. Krakoff
hated his brother Abel to
parshah,
Jacob dreams of a
Special to the
be compelled to kill him.
ladder
reaching
the heav-
Jewish News
Similarly, Esau must have
ens enabling him to wake
hated Jacob after he stole
up refocused and reener-
both the firstborn inheritance and the gized, anxious to fulfill the substance
blessing. But interestingly, the word
of his dream — bringing the beauty
hate never appears in either of these
of God's majesty and the potential for
two stories.
increased holiness into the world.
It is in this week's portion that the
No longer being held back by the
Torah first illuminates the destruc-
14 years of hard labor he spent in
tive power associated with true
Laban's house, Jacob emerges with
hatred (Genesis 29:31). Following
a clear personal mission to pursue.
Jacob's surprise marriage to Leah
May we, like Jacob, spend more of our
after working seven years for her
energy focused on climbing our own
sister Rachel, we are told that Leah
ladders, while abandoning our feelings
became hated by Jacob. But isn't his
of hatred that hold us back and waste
hatred misdirected? While Jacob
our precious energy.
certainly had reason to resent Leah's
father, Laban, for his duplicitous act
Joseph Krakoff is a rabbi at Congregation
of substituting Leah for Rachel, what
Shaarey Zedek of Oakland County.
reason did Jacob have to hate Leah
herself?
The truth is our feelings of hatred
are so often unfounded and based
on anger at ourselves more than
anything else. While some say that
Conversations
Jacob hated Leah due to the deceit-
Is there anyone you dislike
ful conditions of their wedding, it
intensely? Why? Is there any
is more realistic that Laban's trick-
way to reconcile? Is there any-
ery reminded Jacob of how he and
one who dislikes you intensely?
his mother Rebecca deceived his
Can you do something about it?
father, Isaac, a few chapters earlier.
How can we work harder to be
Therefore, Jacob was truly angry at
less critical and better appreci-
his own misconduct.
ate our differences?
There is no question that we often
hate people for exposing our inse-

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