1 Spirituality
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The Rest Of The Story
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Shabbat Vayigash: Genesis 44:18-
47Z7; Ezekiel 37:15-28.
I
n the midst of the saga about
Joseph and his brothers, every
emotion, every real-life interac-
tion, every challenge and success to
face a family occurs — from the worst
imaginable conflict, to revenge and
reconciliation and even to forgiveness.
And now as we approach the end
of the story with the reunion of the
brothers, we might expect Joseph to
follow the old adage to fight fire with
fire. If nothing
else, he's human
— and we're all
guilty of it. Our
inclination leads
us to fight hate
with hate, to
fight anger with
anger. So here
with Joseph,
after all that he's
Rabbi Michael
been through,
Moskowitz
could we expect
Special to the
him to do much
Jewish News
else?
At this point
in the story,
Joseph's brothers are going down to
Egypt and asking this high-powered
individual for some help — having no
idea that it is their brother standing
before them or is even alive.
So what does Joseph do? Finally he
has his revenge. Just as they taunted
and deceived him, casting him into a
pit and selling him into slavery, so too
does he play with them. He gives them
a taste of their own medicine. He lets
his anger direct his actions. And in
reality, we truly can't be surprised by
what Joseph has done.
But then something remarkable
happens. Judah approaches Joseph and
says, "Let me, I beg you, speak a word
to you. Let not your anger burn against
me, your servant." And suddenly
Joseph no longer feels good about the
charade he has created. Suddenly, he
wants to forgive.
The rabbis suggest that it must have
been something specific which Judah
said which touched a nerve. Something
he did that truly hit home. In looking
through these verses, we find Judah
recounting step by step the entire story
of the brothers' relationship with this
prime minister of Egypt. But most of
all, in doing this, Judah adds some-
thing that shows Joseph who he has
become. He ends by saying, "Let me
remain instead of Benjamin. Let him
return to our father. Take me instead of
him as your slave
With this, Joseph sees that his
brother not only has grown as a per-
son, but he is a different individual.
He has made teshuvah (repentance).
Maimonides explained that true
repentance is not merely regret. We
can't experience teshuvah until we find
ourselves in a situation akin to the one
in which we stumbled earlier. It is at
that moment, when we overcome the
temptation that did us in initially, that
we have fully completed all the stages
of repentance.
Judah's initial response might have
been anger — how dare this Egyptian
harm my family! But fighting fire with
fire wouldn't have won the day here;
nor would it have appeased or even
taught Joseph. Instead, he remained
calm. Instead, he shared from his
heart. Instead, he touched Joseph by
showing him that he was a different
individual than the one he knew as a
child.
And he did all of this through the
words he chose — and that remains a
valuable lesson for us today. It is about
the words we choose; the words we
use, and the manner in which they're
shared. Yes, the words in and of them-
selves are important, but more often
than not, the way in which they are
communicated makes all the differ-
ence in the world.
Kindness breeds fellowship, and
nothing in the world is stronger than
that. We don't advance by competition.
We move forward by cooperation. This
led Joseph to want to forgive. Forgive
and forget? No. But forgive and return
the kindness? Definitely.
Michael Moskowitz is a rabbi at
Congregation Shir Shalom in West
Bloomfield.
Conversations
How easy is it to forgive and
forget? What harm ensues from
failing to forgive and/or forget?
How would that impede our
growth as people and as Jews?
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