WISHING OUR CUSTOMERS & FRIENDS A HEALTHY & HAPPY NEW YEAR! Siegero I Arts & 1-qntertainment 3426 E. West Maple Rd., at Haggerty Rd. • (248) 926-9555 :DINE-IN OR CARRY OUT: 20% 9/30/07 OFF DELI SPECIAL ✓ i I ▪ IN 1 59 9 LOX PLATE FOR 2 with fresh fruit plate 1 1 1 1 1 $ 1 1 99 expires 9/30/07 •••. MU =I ONO ..... YOM KIPPUR SPECIAL i 1 lb. Corned Beef, I I Deli Rye, ' I 1 pint Coleslaw, $ I I I 1 pint Potato Salad IL _______ 9/30/07 - - - ____ I ✓ MI IMO Delicate Relationship 1 expires 1 1 lb Sable $19.99. 1 lb. Lox $15.99 I 11 lb. Whitefish $7.99 • Dairy Tray $13.991 includes fresh fruit basket1/2lb. fish per person I 1 expires 9/30/07 .1 I 1 1 BUY 1 SANDWICH I expires 9/30/07 with soup & drink I Sandee Brawarsky Special to the Jewish News $799 T • fp- THE GALLERY RESTAURANT Enjoy gracious dining amid a beautiful atmosphere of casual elegance BREAKFAST • LUNCH • DINNER ( $1' 7 a.m.- 9:30 p.m. SUN. 8 a.m.- 9 p.m. Bloomfield Plaza • 6638 Telegraph Road and Maple • 248-851-0313 OPEN 7 DAYS: MON.- SAT. ----- ----------71-1- -- ' -N4141.111111L BENTLEY'S BANQUET FACILITY Earg 1294490 Special $2p Four Course Meal ‘101 Tues-Sat4--7pm Private Room for special events Includes: Soup, Salad, Seven clays a week Choice of Lamb Shank, Whit4sh, Grilled Salmon, from 7 am–miclni Ribeye Steak Grilled Chicken, Eggplant Barcelona plus Dessert Hours of Operation Tuesday Thursday 5pm - 10pm Friday & 5aturcla9 "pm - llpm Afternoon High Tea Friday & Saturday 12:50pm--1-pm - by reservation q3e4e€ 5586 Drake Road West Bloomfield, Michigan +8522 2+8.592.1500 Food & I Spirits The Staff of Beau Jacks Wishes All Our Customers A Very Happy & Healthy New Year 4108 West Maple • Bloomfield Hills • (248) 626-2630 122 September 13 • 2007 Are your "adult children" home for the holidays? Author offers tips for shalom bayit. he phrase "adult children" is not an oxymoron. Rather, for parents, this is an altogether challenging stage, different from teaching a child to read or manage teen crises, and it's a stage that lasts for decades — from the time that kids first leave home until the time that parents reach the point when they need their children's help. Not much has been written about this territory, and Jane Isay explores it with much insight in Walking on Eggshells: Navigating the Delicate Relationship Between Adult Children and Parents (Doubleday; $23.95). Isay, a 67-year-old retired publish- ing executive who is the mother of two sons, now 37 and 41, writes, "We're the first generation to have raised our children so permissively, and when they became adults, we could not call on our own experience as grown children — because our parents had raised us so differently. "It's as if we awakened on a new planet and everything was turned on its head. The independence we worked so hard to instill in our children now feels to us like disinterest, and strong- minded youngsters sometimes grow into thoughtless adults!" Over the last 10 or so years, as Isay spoke to friends about her sons and her sometimes strained relationships with them, she came to see that many par- ents felt vulnerabilities and pain when it came to their own grown-up children, yet they rarely talked about it. As an editor, she saw the need for a book on the subject, but never was able to match a writer to the project. So now, in the newest stage of her career, she decided to write the book herself. Walking on Eggshells is a weave of compelling stories drawn from inter- views and Isay's linking narrative. Her advice about giving advice: "They don't want it. They don't hear it. They resent it. Don't give it!' She adds, "Of course you give advice, but while keeping in mind that criti- cism, judgment and belittling sends them away. The other thing is that . , vigatizN Dclit-Aic 1;c1c•VCCII ChildVell and l'aretn., Isay conducted 75 interviews around the country, with members of both generations, ages 25-70. they have the home-court advantage: They're going to outlive us." Isay retired in 2004 after a distin- guished 40-year career in book pub- lishing. She was the kind of editor who got deeply engaged with her subjects and authors. While she edited a wide range of nonfiction books, one of her specialty areas was psychology. In the late 1960s and '70s, she published pioneering books by leading psychoanalysts and child development experts at Yale. During her tenure running Basic Books, she edited Robert J. Litton's classic, Nazi Doctors, and commis- sioned Alice Miller to write The Drama of the Gifted Child and Search for the True Self, longtime bestsellers. She also worked with Mary Pipher on Reviving Ophelia and Melissa Fay Greene on Praying for Sheetrock. She comes from a psychology back- ground and found that she developed her own analytical and listening skills as an editor. Isay was born in Cincinnati, where her father was a professor of pastoral psychology at Hebrew Union College and later became a psychiatrist. Her mother, Rose Franzblau, wrote a col- umn on human relations for the New York Post for 25 years; she also hosted one of the first call-in radio shows in the 1960s.