Got
Relatives?
Jewish Wisdom for
INTERFAITH
Stressful Family Moments
What Is It With Boston?
Ann Arbor
M
any people know the
statistic that in intermar-
ried families only about
30 percent are raising their children
as Jews. Then, at the end of last year,
the results of the 2005 Boston Jewish
Community Survey were
released and got every-
one's attention.
It found that 60 percent
of intermarried families in
that city raise their chil-
dren Jewish. Many people
have praised its findings;
others have criticized it.
In any case, it certainly
has folks talking about the
efficacy of outreach.
What makes Boston different
from other cities in America? The
study heavily suggests that it is
outreach. According to Ed Case
of InterfaithFamily.com , Boston's
Combined Jewish Philanthropies
(CJP) spends more on outreach than
any other federation in the country.
The commitment from the CJP
for the last decade has enabled the
Northeast Council of the Union for
Reform Judaism to offer more pro-
grams and to advertise in the secular
press, resulting in increased par-
ticipation and, ultimately, increased
affiliation.
Paula Brody, director of outreach
for the Northeast Council, estimates
that her programs work with 600 to
750 interfaith couples or non-Jews
each year. She likens it to "a medium-
sized congregation of unaffiliated
people stepping into the Jewish com-
munity every year for the last 10
years."
Like all studies, the Boston study
has its critics. Some believe that
outreach did not play a role. They
say that Boston already has a unique
community with plenty of oppor-
tunities for Jewish education and
activities.
They also suggest that the 60 per-
cent is inflated because many of the
respondents who answered "Jewish"
to the question of their child's iden-
tity would have answered "Jewish
and something else" if that were one
of the choices.
Let's suppose for a moment that
many people would have answered
"Jewish and something else." Does it
matter? The study would still show
that 60 percent identified their chil-
dren as Jews in some form or anoth-
er. We should recognize what these
respondents contribute to the Jewish
community.
Many live Jewishly — religiously
and culturally, and I don't mean just
eating bagels with a smear
of cream cheese. Many join
synagogues. Many donate to
Jewish causes and passion-
ately support Israel.
I see it in my own commu-
nity; I live it every day.
Of course, some interfaith
families choose to do noth-
ing at all — so do many
households with two Jewish
parents. How do you draw
them in? Outreach.
Outreach makes it easier for inter-
faith families to make Jewish choices.
Many converts, and non-Jewish
spouses who are welcomed at temple,
often are the most deeply committed
to raising Jewish children — and the
most active in synagogue activities.
Outreach can also fuel Jewish
life in our cities. If Boston truly is
a unique Jewish community, we
shouldn't merely be content to stop
there.
Why settle with just one or two cit-
ies like that? Why not try to invigo-
rate other communities and attract
more people. How do we do that?
Outreach.
So why are some reluctant to fund
outreach? Do they not want to spend
the money? What was the percent-
age of the CJP's budget committed to
outreach? 1.5 percent. Relatively not
much.
In an age when it is easier to marry
outside rather than inside Judaism,
outreach is one of the few forces that
draws people back to Jewish life —
and in many cases, to Jewish life for
the first time. Why on earth would
we not want to fund outreach?
Jim Keen is author of the book "Inside
Intermarriage: A Christian Partner's
Perspective on Raising a Jewish Family"
(URJ Press, forthcoming) and a con-
tributor to the book "The Guide to
the Jewish Interfaith Family Life: an
InterfaithFamily.com Handbook" (Jewish
Lights Publishing). He is a columnist for
InterfaithFamily.com . His e-mail address
is jckeen@umich.edu.
Join us for a special
Kabbalat Shabbat Service
and dynamic guest speaker,
Leonard Felder, Ph.D.
Leonard Felder, Ph.D., is a licensed
psychologist and co-author of best-selling
Making Peace with Your Parents and When
Difficult Relatives Happen to Good People -
Surviving Your Family and Keeping Your Sanity.
As a recognized national expert on improving
difficult family situations, his books have sold
more than a million copies and have been
translated into fourteen languages.
Oneg Shabbat dessert reception to follow.
Please register at 248/357-5544.
To pre-order signed copies of Dr. Felder's
book, please call the synagogue office.
7:30 PM • Friday, March 9, 2007
Shaare Zedek Southfield - Free of Charge
*1 , :ttfi
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John Kazanowski, D.D.S.
31700 Telegraph Rd.
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Bingham Farms
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Lois Haron, Allied Member ASID • 248-851-6989i
March 1. 2007
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