THERE'S NOTHING MORE UNFASHIONABLE' THAN PAYING FULL RETAIL. [CAN YOU RELATE?] Introducing our newest column: Therapist Brenda Strausz answers readers' questions about relationships of all kinds. My 13-year-old son wants more Ca My 8- and 5-year-old daugh- PR 1 ME OUTLETS independence than I am willing to have tried separating them and it give him. I am confused as to how doesn't change a thing. much freedom is acceptable. It has Please help! become a constant battle. Can you — reader in Southfield BIRCH RUN %ham ters are constantly fighting. I —reader in Birmingham oppi A Take advantage of quiet The power of passionate shopping BANANA REPUBLIC FACTORY STORE • POTTERY BARN OUTLET GAP OUTLET • CALVIN KLEIN BCBG MAX AZRIA FACTORY STORE • NINE WEST OUTLET ...over 150 brand-name stores! Bring this ad to Guest Services to receive a FREE coupon book! 1-75 to Exit 136 • 877-BR-OUTLETS • primeoutlets.com times to teach your children A problem-solving and negotiating two things we can give our children: techniques; children are much One is roots and the other is wings. more receptive and open during There is certainly a delicate bal- "non-fighting" moments. You can ance between wanting to keep your approach this with a spirit of play child safe while allowing him inde- — pick a problem, brainstorm pendence. Consider these factors: How has he handled freedom in the which ones would be most viable. past? How responsible is he? What When your daughters are fight- are his friends like? How well do you angry feelings, listen to each side We specialize in: It's Personal... Let's Keep It That Way With Private, Individual Service Wigs Hair Replacement Pieces Pull-Thru Systems (using your own hair) Satisfying clients with high quality hair products for over 16 years. Call about receiving your 20% DISCOUNT! Before Before 7091 Orchard Lake Rd. • Suite 250 • West Bloomfield, MI 48322 16 • (),_ IURI.It • theultimatehair. corn JNPLATI NUM know his friends' parents? It's important to decide on your and let them know you under- expectations in advance, such as stand how difficult this must be for curfew times, check-in times, adult them. "You two sound furious with supervision, etc. Then you can dis- each other!" or "It must be hard cuss them with your child. He may when you both want to use the balk, but you can let him know that computer at the same time." as he gets older, the rules can be Then, express your confidence in their problem-solving abilities: modified. Teens need independence; that is "I know that you two can come how they grow up to be responsible up with a good solution for this." adults. Give them independence in If they seem baffled, you can increments according to their age casually offer a few suggestions and maturity, and then you will be and exit. Many conflicts get magi- able to observe how they man- cally solved when parents leave age responsibility. You have already the room. Of course, if safety is a given your son roots. In these teen- concern, firmness and time-outs age years, he will slowly learn to fly are definitely in order. and hopefully even soar! Recommended reading: Recommended reading: Siblings Without Rivalry by Surviving Your Adolescents Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish by Thomas W. Phelan After To personally preview the latest innovations in hair restoration call today and schedule a FREE consultation with our hair loss experts! 248-855-9600 It has been said that there are possible solutions and decide ing, you can acknowledge their VVWW. offer advice? Brenda Strausz, M.A., is a local psychotherapist, parent educator, certified relationship coach and certified hypnotherapist. E-mail her your questions at relate@thejewishnews.com .