Opinion
Editorials are posted and archived on JNonline.us .
Dry Bones
Editorial
Immigration Quandary
I
mmigration is
an issue that
is close to the hearts and
emotions of American Jews.
Most of us are the children or
grandchildren of immigrants
and we feel it is only fair that
others are afforded the same eco-
nomic opportunities and politi-
cal freedom that came to them.
There is also the matter of
how America's doors were closed
when so many might have been
given shelter from
the Holocaust.
Many organiza-
tions, therefore,
believe that illegal
immigrants who
are working in this
country, pay their
taxes, speak English and have
family here should be given a
chance to stay, no matter how
they got here.
It sounds compassionate, but
it's a situation that may be rife
with unintended consequences.
There were two news stories in
recent weeks, for example, about
illegal individuals. They met all
the criteria for citizenship set
forth above and were regarded
as solid members of their com-
munities. One was married to a
Jewish man and, while not con-
verting herself, went to services
with him and played an active
role at their synagogue.
There was only one problem.
Both immigrants had lied to
enter this country. Both had
served as guards at Nazi prison
facilities during the Holocaust.
And the U.S. Bureau of
Immigration and Naturalization
deported both of them, even
law make a distinction, and
what would that distinction be
based upon? All these ex-Nazis
wanted to do; after all, was to
make a good living and be with
their families. Are some lies
more illegal than other lies?
The greater question: If the
United States compromises on
the integrity of its borders, in
what position does that place
Israel? Its security fence already
A country that loses control of its borders is
a country with a perilous future. If the
immigration laws are unfair, change the laws.
though they lived here for more
than 50 years.
There is no question that the
government acted properly. No
matter what their conduct had
been since arriving in America,
the blot on their past, the origi-
nal lie they told, bought them a
ticket out.
But if amnesty is regarded as
the right course for some illegal
immigrants, couldn't that same
legal precedent be used to fight
deportation by others? Can the
has come under international
condemnation by those who fail
to make a distinction between
fences designed to keep terror-
ists out and those designed to
keep people imprisoned.
The Palestinians claim an
absolute right of return to Israel.
It is an issue they refuse to set
aside in negotiations. They
understand its emotional impact
on the world community and
also,understand it is the surest
way to destroy the Jewish state.
ISLAMISTS ARE
FIRE—BOMBING AND
DEMANDING THAT
THEIR "HONOR" BE
RESTORED!??!
rag
WHO DO WE HAVE
WHO UNDERSTANDS
THESE PEOPLE?'
PERHAPS
SOMEONE IN
SICILY.
SICILY?
DryBonesBlog.com
Instead of calling it a right of
return, what if they just start
calling it an amnesty?
A country that loses control
of its borders is a country with a
perilous future. If the immigra-
tion laws are unfair, change the
laws. But don't wink and nod
and try to pretend that ignoring
inconvenient laws has no conse-
quences.
When anyone gets to decide
what laws should be obeyed, no
one is safe.
door, leaving it par-
tially open and run-
ning down the bat-
tery while we were
at a dinner party.
There was still lots
of juice left in it.
I had kept my cell
phone on during a
drive to Chicago and
back and forgotten
to turn it off over-
night. It wasn't dead
at all, only sleeping.
My TV had fallen victim to a
power surge. Once I turned off
all the electrical connections
for 10 seconds, it came back on
immediately and the sinister red
light disappeared. Best of all, the
air conditioner just needed a new
motor and some other gizmo at
minimal cost.
I know, I know. I spent half
my life without air conditioning
and cell phones and with more
reasonably sized TVs. But I need
and want them now.
Maybe the machines were just
feeling put upon and decided to
teach me a lesson in responsible
behavior. If so, I am grateful for
the truce and the preservation of
my bank account.
But the clothes dryer has been
making funny noises lately and
I suspect I may have a rogue on
my hands. I've got my eyes on
it and the authorities have been
alerted.
The machines may be taking
over, but I'm not going down
without a fight.
E-mail letters of no more than 150
words to:
letters@thejewishnews.com .
Reality Check
Revolt Of The Machines
M
y wife tells me I swear
too much at inani-
mate objects.
How very wrong she is. I curse
the appliances because they are
secretly plotting my downfall and
economic ruin.
Where is the proof of such
an outlandish claim? Well you
may ask. The attack began quite
simply with the air conditioner.
We've had this same unit since
we moved into our house 18
years ago and every summer, as
I switch it on, I utter a fervent
prayer that it will work just one
more time.
My winning streak of 17
straight years was broken in July
... just as the hottest spell of the
summer was settling in.
But that was just the tease. I
was not going to be let off that
28
October 5 2005
easy. This was going to be a
full-scale mechanical offensive.
Within a matter of weeks:
• The freezer on the refrigera-
tor went into meltdown mode.
• No hot water came through
the shower.
• Sherry's car battery died.
• My cell phone went similarly
belly up.
• The pride of my life, the 51-
inch TV set in the family room,
turned itself off and refused to
come back on. Except for one
weird, blinking red light near the
control panel. A coded message
to its co-conspirators? Perhaps.
I am not making any of this
up. Could it all be coincidence?
Please. I don't like being played
for a sap.
The machines had declared a
revolution and I was looking at
bills that would ruffle
Warren Buffett.
I saw something like
this happen in that
movie about mean
robots with Will Smith.
Woody Allen once said
he distinctly heard an
elevator make an anti-
Semitic remark to him
as he disembarked. I'm
on to these wretched
tools of oppression.
Then, a wonderful and totally
unexpected thing occurred. They
all got fixed. It seemed the freezer
just needed to have its timer
readjusted and the hot water
heater required a $12 part to
hook up to the pilot light mecha-
nism.
A valet parking service had
jammed the seat belt into the car
George Cantor's e-mail address is
gcantor614@aol.com .