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Holiday Memories

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6

September 28 ® 2006

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Southfield, MI 48075
248-352-0222 • Ask for David

mailed every one of us a
wring a cantor's
copy with a note telling us
solo on Rosh
to read it and pass it along
Hashanah, I whis-
to another friend. He told
pered into Mom's ear.
us that Morrie's lesson of
"Dad would be humming
making the best of the life
along right now."
you receive saved his life.
Morn nodded slightly, a
Three years ago, he told
tear coming to her eye.
me he was a horn-again
He's been gone for two
Christian. He said his sick-
years and I'll never forget
ness was the best thing that
Dad when he was in shul. He
happened to him because
only appearedthere when it
it forced him to enjoy the
was a b'nai mitzvah, a wed-
short time he had left. Before he lost
ding, or the three days each year when
the use of his legs, he went on a cross-
every sanctuary is full.
country drive in his car. Up'north, over
He never davened or spoke Hebrew.
the Mackinac Bridge, across the Upper
The last time I went with him he was
Peninsula, he kept going on a personal
in the middle stage of Alzheimer's and
journey that allowed him to meet peo-
unable to read. He followed along as
ple around the country.
best he could, and hummed along as
He settled in Ishpeming, and moved
usual to the prayers. I wasn't sure if Dad
from his mother's house to an assisted
understood the meaning of anything
living facility where 100 other "mothers"
he heard, but he seemed to enjoy being
doted over him.
there, and the music comforted him.
When I told him that I was writing a
I never asked him about his beliefs
story about an Ishpeming school that
in God. I didn't want to upset him, and
holds an annual Holocaust exhibit, he
besides, it's not a good thing to ask that
drove to the school the next day and
question to someone with a number
introduced himself to the teacher. They
tattooed on his forearm — you let him
quickly became friends. He also became
bring up the subject, and he never did.
friends with Detroit Holocaust survivors
The High Holy Days have been espe-
who
visited the exhibit every year.
cially hard to take the last few years.
We
talked to each other about every
Each season for some five years has
six
months
and the conversation never
been marked with the loss of a father
lasted
under
90 minutes. He wanted to
among my old college friends. Most of
hear
everything
about my life, and he
them aren't Jewish, but the bonds we
wondered
how
I
could deal in such a
share are beyond religion, and comfort
complicated
world,
because his revolved
is still comfort.
around
the
people
he
knew in the corn-
We've known each other for more
munity
and
the
nursing
home he volun-
than 30 years. We mostly keep in touch
teered
at
—
the
one
he
would
eventu-
through e-mail, but everyone tries to
ally
move
into.
get together annually for a Spartan
Though he could no longer walk, he
game.This year, instead of a father, we're
could
still make a difference comforting
mourning the loss of one of our own.
families
in the home's hospice program.
He was nicknamed "Baba" by a pair of
He
also
became engaged to one of
Japanese foreign exchange students who
the
nurses.
The last time I talked to him
were living in our dorm freshman year
was
soon
after
my father passed away.
and the name stuck. At 6' 6',' he towered
We
talked
for
hours,
and he mentioned
over everyone. Baba wasn't much of a
his
faith
in
God,
and
how
happy it made
studier; he was too much of a people
him.
person for that, and he always seemed
I learned of his passing last week. He
to be in the middle of a great time — he
died
peacefully and knowing exactly
was unforgettable. School didn't take,
what
was waiting for him.
so two years later he dropped out and
I'd
like to own the absolute faith he
Moved back to Detroit.
had
in
God, but I think of the Holocaust,
He still came to reunions because he
of
9-11,
Darfur and thousands of other
was still such a huge part of our college
atrocities
committed in this world and
experience, but he didn't shake the par-
I'm
not
willing
to go that far in my
tying habit like the rest of us.
beliefs,
so
I
guess
I'll just hum.
It was about 10 years ago when we
Shalom, my friend. Shalom, Papa. I
learned about his multiple sclerosis; he
miss you both.
began a slide down an abyss that our
group didn't know how to help.
Harry Kirsbaum's e-mail address is
Mitch Albom's book, Tuesdays with
.
shkirsbaum@thejewishnews.com
began
his
redemption.
He
Morrie,