the same state, much less the
same city.
Techner notes that a report in
Cemetery Magazine found that
visits to cemeteries are down by
80 percent in recent years.
Ultimately, the decision for cre-
mation falls not to the deceased
himself, but to a family member.
Once a young boy helped make
the choice. His father had been
killed in an accident, and before •
his death the man had made it
known he wanted to be cremated.
"Dad always gave us what-
ever we asked for:' the boy told
Techner. "How can we not honor
his wishes?"
Yet, no matter what someone
has requested or what is con-
tained in his will, according to
Michigan law, a body will not
be cremated until the -next-of-
kin signs a form approving the
action. The spouse is regarded
as the first next-of-kin, followed
by children, parents, then a sib-
ling. So if a man dies and his
wife objects to his cremation, no
matter what his preference, or
the preference of his children,
parents and siblings, he will not
be cremated.
Dorfman Chapel will make
arrangements for those families
who chose cremation. It's a better

option, Jonathan Dorfman says,
than having Jews turn to gentile
funeral homes. "Our whole goal
is to take care of the community."
Many Reform and
Conservative rabbis "are com-
pletely comfortable presiding
at a memorial service for a
cremation:' Dorfman says. They
come to speak at the chapel, and
there is no graveside ceremony,
of course. There's also often no
taharah (purification) before
cremation, and the deceased is
not necessarily wrapped in the
traditional white shroud.
If cremation is chosen because
it's less expensive, Dorfman will
inform families that cremation
is against Jewish law and explain
options for financial assistance
should the family prefer a burial.
"No one he says, "is ever denied
a proper funeral because of
financial reasons."

.

won't use his last name for this
story. He knows this subject isn't
accepted by most in the Jewish
community. He doesn't want to
have any big debates about this.
"It was a practical matter;'
he says of his decision to have
his mother cremated. She lived
out of state. John had her cre-
mated, then brought her ashes
to be placed in the Birmingham
Temple garden.
"Neither my mother nor I are
religious in a conventional sense
John says. "She knew cremation
would be the most expedient way
of disposing of her body."
He finds the idea of "putting

a body into a wood coffin a bar-
baric custom that doesn't have
any meaning to me
John was born in Europe, and
members of his family were
killed in the Holocaust. Still, he
sees "no connection" between
what happened in the death
camps and a Jew today who opts
for cremation.
He cannot visit his mother's
grave, of course. But John doesn't
mind. He attends the temple's
annual memorial service, looks
at family names on the temple's
wall, and there, he says, "I find
comfort and memories." ❑

Famous Jews Who
Were Cremated

Among the famous Jews
who opted for cremation:
Isaac Asimov, Albert Einstein,
Milton Berle, Sigmund Freud,
Linda McCartney, Al Lewis,
Groucho Marx, Harp° Marx,
Zeppo Marx, Carl Sagan,
Peter Sellers, Rod Serling and
Gilbert Maxwell Anderson, an
innovative businessman and
studio owner also known as
the film world's first cowboy
hero Bronco Billy.

Related stories: JNonline.us

'Barbaric Custom'

Once a year, the Birmingham
Temple holds a memorial service
for those buried there. It is, Rabbi
Kolton says, "one of the most
gratifying services we do!'
John is a member of the
Birmingham Temple who had his
mother cremated and who plans
to be cremated himself. Still, he

What Happens?

Cremation may have been practiced as early as 3000 BCE. In the
Roman Empire, 27 BC . E to 395 C.E., cremation was very popu-
lar, though five years later when Constantine came to power it
became virtually unknown. Constantine was a Christian, and his
religion, at the time, regarded cremation as a pagan practice.
In 1873, cremation re-entered society when Professor Brunetti,
an Italian inventor, created the first known modern crematory.
It made its premier at the Vienna Exposition. Soon afterward,.
England, the United States and Germany all built crematories.
By 1900, 20 crematories were operating in the United States;
according to the latest survey, conducted in 2004,1,867 are now
in existence in this country alone.
Bodies'usually are laid in a plain box before being placed into
the cremation oven. Should the deceased have a pacemaker,
this is first removed because it can explode. It takes about two
to three hours for a body to burn (a family may stay, if desired).
Afterward, bones and teeth may remain. These are ground up
and, together with the ashes, placed into a container.
A number of options are available once the body has been cre-
mated. The ashes can go into permanent storage at a cemetery.
Or, the cemetery will hold them indefinitely until .a family opts to
take them. Or, the family can take the ashes home. Most often,
they are then dispersed in a favorite location of the deceased.

Jonathan Dorfman:

"Our whole goal is

to take care of the

community."

- Elizabeth Applebaum, contributing editor

April 13 - 2006

31