R I S T O R ANTE CAFE CORTINA SINCE 1976 WHERE PATRONS FROM ALL OVER THE GLOBE HAVE CELEBRATED THEIR PRIVATE EVENTS! disappears through the swinging doors that lead into the kitchen, and it comes out some time later, neatly sliced and ready to serve. At some parties that I have been to, the family does it differently. They all gather around the challah, and instead of cutting it with a knife, each member of the family tears off a piece. It involves everyone in the mitzvah, and it is much more infor- mal and heimish than having one per- son do it, and then having the people in the kitchen do the rest. And it is certainly easy to do. Level two: Consider baking the chal- lah yourself, as a family project. Baking the challah yourself is literally a hands- on mitzvah, is it not? And knowing how to make a challah is a very useful skill to have, something that will come in handy for years to come in the life of the boy or girl who learns how to do it. In this egalitarian age, who says that only girls should know how to bake a challah? Every Jewish wife will be delighted if she finds out that the man she has married knows how to and likes to bake challah. Level three: Ask the rabbi for a list of members of the congregation who are in the hospital and bring them each a challah in honor of Shabbat. If you have ever been in the hospital, you know that it is a lonely and a scary experience, and it feels especially lonely if you are there on Shabbat. Imagine what it would mean to a hospital patient to have someone come in, smile and wish them well, and leave them a loaf of challah to enjoy in honor of Shabbat. Even if you decide to buy instead of to bake, consider buying a couple of extra challot that you can deliver to congregants who are in the hospital in honor of the simcha. Level four: If you have a challah, you have to have a challah cover. Why not assign the honor of making one to one of your relatives or friends who sew? They will feel honored and delighted to be given this mitzvah. Or you can go on the Web and find lots of places where you can pur- chase a challah cover and help the poor at the same time. My favorite is Yad Lakashish, Lifeline to the Poor, where you can not only pick up some beautifully crafted challah covers but can give honor and dignity to the elderly who make them at the same time. Level five: Now it gets exciting. What if you went to your local senior citizen center, nursing home or assist- ed-living center and asked if anyone there still remembers how to sew and knit? If they do, then offer them the mitzvah of making the challah cover for the simcha. You will have a special- ly commissioned work of art for your simcha. How many people can say that? Level six: Invite the senior citizen who has made the challah cover to the dinner as your guest and introduce her to everyone as the artist who made the challah cover that is being used at this event for the very first time. If you do that, you will have two mitzvot for the price of one: You will have added a lovely new work of ritu- al art to the simcha and you will have fulfilled the mitzvah of bringing out the radiance in the face of our elders. And the challah cover that made its debut at this event can become a fam- ily treasure to be taken out again at the engagement party, at the wedding and, if we are fortunate, at the sim- chah of the bar mitzvah child's own son's bar mitzvah. And the child will have learned some important lessons both about how we treat bread and about how we treat old people. This is just one small example of the kind of innovative thinking that is found on almost every single page of Siegel's book. If even a simple challah can provide so many different oppor- tunities for "Mitzvah-izing," then so can every other detail and every other aspect of the experience. Every detail - the invitation, the mitzvah project, the d'var torah, the centerpiece — is an opportunity. No matter how small a detail it may be, it has the power to become a method for doing good and, if it does, then the benefits to the bar or the bat mitzvah child and to everyone else who is present are very great. There is an old joke that you have probably heard that explains why we need this book so much: An exhausted parent says after his child's simchah: "If bar mitzvah is going to get any more expensive, I hope that the next one runs away and becomes bar mitzvah at a justice of the peace." For that parent and for all those who understand what he is saying, this book is a precious resource. So if you know any family that is approach- ing these days of stress and trauma, get them this book. ❑ HOUR DETROIT 2003 Restaurant of the Year FOOD NETWORK Best of Pasta ZAGAT SURVEY America's Top Italian Restaurants 3c7t5 West Ten Mile Rd. • Farmington Hills. 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