7N I so

Travel Fun

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or any of us who have traveled, there exist in
our minds some shudderingly awful
moments. Whether these arise from the
preparations or having to fly to get there, travel can
be horrendous.
This need not be. With the help of the primer-
style of writing, let's explore some of the fun that
exists in travel.
Here is Traveler. He is going
away. Won't that be fun?
First, Traveler must pack his suit-
case. In go shirts. In go pants. In
goes underwear. In go socks. Isn't
there a lot that goes in? Pack,
Traveler. Pack. See Traveler pack
the entire contents of his closet.
(Do we want to hear how much
SY
the airline will charge him for over-
MANELLO weight baggage? I do not think so.)
Editorial
See Traveler head for the airport.
Assistant
Isn't freeway traffic fun? Do the
other drivers know that Traveler is

going away? Do they care? Of course not. They
cause tie-ups. Is Traveler having fun yet? Hear
Traveler mumble. Mumble, Traveler. Mumble.
See Traveler at the airport. See him run for the
gate. Run, Traveler. Run.
See Traveler being stopped by security. See
Traveler remove his hiking boots. Oh, the laces are
knotted. Untie, Traveler. Untie. Hear the beeper go
off. Go back, Traveler. Go back. See Traveler go
back through the security gate. See him empty his
pockets of coins and keys. See him remove his belt
with the shiny buckle. Isn't Traveler having fun?
Would you not like to have fun like that? See
Traveler being wanded by the nice security person.
See him return all his belongings to his person.
Traveler is now almost late for his plane. See Traveler
run. Run, Traveler. Run.
Traveler is at the gate at last. Oh. Oh. Hear the
attendant announce that there has been a gate
change for the plane. See traveler grab his carry-on
and run for the new gate. Would you not like to get
all that exercise?
At last Traveler is on his plane. See the lady
behind Traveler hit him on the head as she puts her

Glory Days

During the winter holidays last year, Charles "Chuck" Tink and a childhood
friend hopped in a car and toured their old Detroit neighborhood on
Calvert and Dexter.
"We didn't expect to see the same businesses, but we were amazed to see
how many empty lots there were," said Tink, 57, of West Bloomfield.
They found themselves saying things like, "Hey, I remember when the
,,
Dexter Theatre was there and I remember when Emerson TV was there,
Tink said.
Talk about his "excursion" drew comments and wonderful conversations
from other friends and family, so he decided to do a little project that
became a nearly 200-
page spreadsheet that
maps out every store,
school and place of
worship on both
Linwood and Dexter
from beginning to end.
Each page represents
a city block, and also
describes the cross
streets and addresses
during three different
years, including 1952
and 1958 to map the
migration of Jews from
Charles Tink works on neighborhood spreadsheet.
the neighborhood.
"The early 1950s was
when the Holocaust
survivors were immigrating to the United States and settling in that area. A
lot of the kids I played with were Holocaust survivors," he said. "By 1958,
the exodus had already happened to the Mumford area or Oak Park, and I
wanted to be able to identify what was there then."
He gleaned information from old Polk street sequence directories, and
scoured the 2004 Yellow Pages "line by line," to show how devastated the
neighborhood had become.
A JNstory on the project printed months ago generated e-mails from
readers who provided more information.
"It was kind of like a stamp collection," he said. 'As I got more informa-
tion, I made changes. I never knew the gentleman who owned the Dexter
Theatre and the gentlemen who owned Dexter Chevrolet were father and
son. I put whatever information I found into the list."
Tink is charging $10 for the Dexter edition and $12 for the Linwood edi-
tion to cover printing and mailing expenses. For more information, contact
Chuck Tink at ctink270147MI@comcast.net .

8/18

2005

10

luggage above her seat. Groan, Traveler. Groan.
See the plane take off. Rise, plane. Rise. Traveler is
on his way to fun. Now it is time to be comfortable.
See the man in front of Traveler recline his seat.
Crush go Traveler's knees. Crush, crush, crush.
Would you not like to be cramped like that?
Here comes the flight attendant with things to
drink. See the lady next to Traveler bump his arm
and spill the drink in his lap. It is so cool and
refreshing. Do you think Traveler is having fun yet?
When the plane lands, Traveler is ready to enjoy
his time away. First, he must claim his luggage. See
Traveler look for the baggage claim area. Search,
Traveler. Search. The carousel has been changed so
Traveler must really hunt. Hunt, Traveler. Hunt.
There is no baggage for Traveler. He must ask some-
one. An attendant says that some of the luggage did
not make it to Miami. It went to another city with
an "M," maybe it was Moscow. Maybe not. Do not
worry, Traveler. It will turn up soon. At least before
you go home. Go, Traveler. And have fun.
Oh, what fun a vacation can be. Would you not
like to have fun like that? Suuuure you would (and
probably have).

❑

What's New?!

Jewish News readers may have noticed some subtle and not-so-subtle changes
this summer. A major one is the new To Life! section in the front of the
paper.
To Life! includes features on generations, teens, relationships, interfaith
families, health, travel, sports and rotating columnists — information about
you, your family and friends. As the Jewish News grows this fall, you will see
a more formal rotation of subjects in To Life! Enjoy.
L'Chayim!
— To Life! Editors Keri Guten Cohen and Alan Hitsky

Protest Denial Unfair

Dearborn officials unfairly punished those who were protesting against Israel in
2002 by not waiving a 30-days-in-advance requirement for a permit.
The - U.S. 6th Circuit Court of Appeals in Cincinnati ruled last week that the
ordinance allowed city officials to unconstitutionally decide which protests, in
the form of marches or demonstrations, could take place. The suit was filed by
Dearborn resident Imad Chammout and the American-Arab Anti-
Discrimination Committee. The city is considering appealing the decision.

— Harry Kirsbaum, staffwriter

Yiddish Limericks

,,
You ve caused us no end of distress,
The pigs told the wolf. "Now, confess.
Your mission's geshtroft*.
You've huffed and you've puffed
A real ongeblozzeneh** mess!"

"

'

— Martha Jo Fleischmann

* cursed
• overblown

RgRIT 'cha Don't Know

What was unusual about the Jewish audience that sold out New York's
Madison Square Garden in April 2004?

— Goldfein

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