OTHER VIEWS

The Case For Choosing Life

New York
already ruined her life. I have sat
n May 1995, Christopher
with women whose husbands
Reeve was taking part in a
have abandoned them for anoth-
cross-country equestrian
er woman. They, too, have told
event when a fall caused his
me that the pain of rejection and
skull to literally become sepa-
the feeling like they are dried-up,
rated from his spinal cord. He
used goods, has made them wish
was totally paralyzed. Of that
they were dead. And I have sat
moment, he later said, "It
with men whom financial failure
RABBI
dawned on me I was going to
had left in such despair that they
be a huge burden to everybody,
SHMULEY thought of serious violence
that I had ruined my life and
BOTEACH against themselves.
Special
everybody else's. Not fair to
In each of these circumstances,
Commentary
like any decent human being, I
anybody. The best thing to do
would be to slip away."
tried my utmost to inspire these
When his wife, Dana, came into his
individuals to choose life. I told them
room he looked at her and mouthed the
that this feeling of hopelessness would
words, "Maybe we should let me go."
pass, that after feeling that they had hit
His wife started crying and said, "I
rock bottom there was nowhere to go
will support whatever you want to do,
but up, that people loved them, that
because this is your life and your deci-
their lives were meaningful, that they
sion. But I want you to know that I'll be
dared not succumb to despair.
with you for the long haul, no matter
I remember how my own grandmoth-
what. You are still you. And I love you."
er told me, on the steps of her apart-
Reeve said that Dana's response to
ment in Jerusalem, that now that one of
him "made living seem possible, because
her sons had died — my Uncle David
I felt the depth of her love and commit-
— she no longer wished to live. She
ment ... My job would be to learn how
told me that she was praying to God for
to cope with this and not be a burden. I
death. Her words shocked me.
would have to find new ways to be pro-
"Savta," I said, "do you know how
ductive again."
much your family loves you? You're the
Reeve went on to inspire the world
leader of this family. We're all nothing
with the depth of his commitment to
without you. How could you say such a
his own life and that of others. Before
ridiculous thing? What about all of
his untimely passing in October of last
your children and grandchildren that
year, he had taught all humanity of the
are left?"
value of life and the indomitable power
I also remember how I once sat with a
of the human spirit.
man who had suffered severe financial
Good thing for all of us that
reversals. His wife had divorced him
Christopher Reeve was not married to
after they had taken away his house. He
someone like Michael Schiavo. When
told me that he had planned on killing
his own wife, Terri, made a throwaway
himself and the only thing that stopped
comment to him — or so he claims —
him was a rabbi who came to see him
that should she ever be reduced to a
and told him, "Today, you look at the
severely disabled state that she would
world through dark sunglasses, and
wish to die, Schiavo ran to fulfill her
everything appears dark. But take off the
request. America has never quite wit-
sunglasses and you'll see the light. There
nessed a husband like Michael Schiavo,
are still so many blessings in your life.
,
a man prepared to take on the entire
And things will get better. I promise.'
might of the U.S. government to ensure
Thank God this man did not first
that his wife ends up six feet under.
speak to someone like Michael Schiavo.
Many people in America wish they
Whenever we have a choice between
were dead, none more so, it seems, that
life and death, the Bible commands us
teenagers. According to the National
to stalwartly choose life, the only excep-
Youth Violence Prevention Resource
tion being the right to take the life of a
Center, almost 1 in 5 teens has serious-
murderer who has forfeited his own life
ly considered attempting suicide. Like
by taking that of another.
many rabbis, priests and pastors, I have
With regards to an utterly innocent
personally sat with a number of people
woman like Terri Schiavo, the choice is
who wanted to kill themselves. I sat
clear. Michael Schiavo should have just
with a 19-year-old girl who tried to slit
gone away and let this poor woman's
her wrists because she thought she had
parents take care of her. Let him find
some other cause worth fighting for.
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is a nationally
Putting your wife to death just doesn't
syndicated talk radio host and a best-sell- seem worthy enough.
ing author. His upcoming book is
For who among us would really be
"Hating Women: America's Hostile
able to say "I'm proud to be an
Campaign Against the Fairer Sex
American" if we let this child of God die
(ReganBooks-HarperCollins). His e-mail a most brutal and barbaric death? ❑
address is shmuley@shmuley.com

I

3/31
2005

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