Open 7 Ddys for Lunch & Dinner Visit our 2nd Livonia location at: 37273 W. Six Mile Rd. (in Newburgh Plaza) (734) 464-5934 being hired as his intern 10 years ago: stuck out my hand, and he said, 'Is that an earring in your ear? Are you gay?' — and walked away. Now this is a man who staunchly fights for gay rights on his show." Not everyone appreciates Handel's politically incorrect humor. Latino groups complained about his remarks following the 1995 death of Tejano pop star Selena; Asian Americans demanded — and got — an on-air apology for his 1996 par- ody involving ice skaters Michelle Kwan and Kristi Yamaguchi. This past March, a Muslim group filed a federal complaint over a skit that suggested Iraqis want to kill Jews, marry camels and meet Japanese schoolgirls in heaven. Bertolucci apologized on the air, stating that Handel "was attempting to make a satirical point about the extremist Iraqis." But Handel refused to apologize. "I'm an equal-opportunity offend- er, and probably the least bigoted person I know," he says. The son of a Holocaust survivor, he says he's sarcastic about racism to expose its absurdity, and loves the American melting pot while loathing political correctness. "Of course, people are fine when I [ridicule] someone else's group,". he adds. "The Koreans hate it when I make dog-eating jokes, but when I joke about Jewish neuroses, it's hilar- ious." When Members of the Tribe call him a "self-loathing Jew," he retorts, "Where were you when I was making fun of the `shvartzes?'" Handel's Jewishness regularly comes up on the show, sometimes in a serious manner. He once tried to take neo-Nazis to Auschwitz to see where his paternal grandparents were gassed. More recently, he recorded a segment about how his father, Leo, fled Nazi-occupied Yugoslavia, posed as a Jesuit in the Vatican and fought in the Jewish Brigade. After the war, Leo Handel immi- grated to Brazil, where the future radio host was born William Wolf Handel in 1951. Five years later, the family moved to Los Angeles, where young Bill quickly learned English — sans bilingual education. If he now maintains that bilingual ed "sucks," his opinion comes from per- sonal experience. "The worst thing you can do to a kid who has just come to this coun- try is give him the opportunity not to learn English," he says. "That kid will never be a banker or doctor or lawyer; he'll be washing my kids' cars." (Handel is married with 9- year-old twin daughters.) As for the young Handel, he says he was precocious but also "an insuf- ferable little a who would talk back and mouth off." Eventually, he parlayed that personality trait into a radio career. As a pioneer in the field of repro- ductive law in the 1980s, he was often invited on TV and radio pro- grams to discuss his then-controver- sial Center for Surrogate Parenting & Egg Donation. During one Today show appearance, he heatedly argued with a fellow guest ("Bryant Gumbel had to peel us apart," he says) and caught the attention of L.A.'s KABC-AM programmers. They invited him to do a Sunday legal advice show. So how did he finagle a full-time, general talk slot in prime-time morning? "Every week for four years, I'd record the worst two minutes on KFI, then play it for the program director and say, 'You should be fired,"' he recalls. In 1993, Handel Yourself in the Morning debuted in the prestigious 5 a.m.-9 a.m. slot; by fall 2003, he had become the No. 1 morning drive host among all adult listeners in Los Angeles, not just the coveted 35- to 54-year-old audience. Although he no longer practices law full time, he still doles out legal advice on his weekend show, Handel on the Law, which is syndicated in more than 50 markets. "I love telling people they have no case," said Handel. He also loves touting himself as KFI's "Latino- Jewish talk show host" — and offending as many people as possi- ble. "Everyone hates me a lot, which is really good," he says, gleefully. "It means I'm doing my job." ❑ . Handel Yourself in the Morning airs 5 a.m. to 9 a.m. weekdays on KFI- AM (640 on the dial) in Los Angeles. You can catch Bill Handel on the Michigan airwaves on his weekly syndicated show, Handel on the Law, which is broadcast 10 p.m.-1 a.m. Saturdays out of Traverse City on WTCM-AM (580 on the dial). For more infor- mation, visit -www.billhandel.com FEATURING AUTHENTIC CHINESE/ASIAN COOKING, SUSHI BAR & DIM SUM CARRYOUT Nut goad ith anyitt ker offer't taupon per fahte • With coupon Expire!: 8/31/04 Lei Ting Szechuan Empire Restaurant Szechuan Empire North 525 N. Main St., Ste 150 Milford 29215 Five Mile Rd. 39450 14 Mile Rd. 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