Single Crisis Orthodox tackle matchmaking emergency. URIEL HEILMAN Jewish Telegraphic Agency New York avid Smith believes Orthodox ewry is facing a crisis — and a communal day of fasting and prayer, like those held occasionally about violence in Israel, is needed to address it. The crisis: Smith and thousands of other Orthodox Jews still are not mar- ried. "Why don't they have a fast for people who are single, to say tehillim or some- thing?" Smith said, referring to psalms. "The first mitzvah in Bereshit is prni u'rvu," he said, specifying the command- ment in Genesis to "be fruitful and mul- tiply. 'Among the singles themselves, there's no direction of what to do. Something has-to be done." Smith, 50, was one of 300 singles, parents and community professionals to turn out for the third annual Shidduch Emergency Conference in New York. Organized by the National Council of Young Israel, the conference addressed what many community members say is a growing problem. Anecdotal evidence suggests that Orthodox Jews are marrying later in life than their parents did, alarming many in a community that is preoccupied with family and Jewish continuity. Sociologists say single Jews are less likely to be active in Jewish communal life than family members, and commu- nity leaders are worried that a later mar- rying age will translate into fewer chil- dren. At stake, some say, is nothing less than the perpetuation of Orthodox ewry. "It's a huge problem all around the ountry," said the president of the rthodox Union, Harvey Blitz. "The 'family is really the center of existence in e Orthodox Jewish community. So eople are obviously very pressured to et married, and the intensity of the pressure only increases when you get Folder. >, For singles, the inability to find a mate can trigger depression, cause stress in relationships with parents and significant thers, and alienate them from the corn- unity. "The reason why it's a crisis is, for the people who are impacted, it becomes the single most dominant factor in their life," Blitz said. "And there's inadequate community structures for helping them to meet people to marry. ), The recent conference in New York was part-networking event, part- sympo- sium and part-workshop. Matchmakers were on hand to interview prospective mates, psychologists talked about over- coming fears of commitment and rabbis instructed attendees about what to look for in a husband or wife. Jacob Weinberger, a middle-aged immigrant from Belgium, came to the conference to help find an Orthodox wife for his son, a U.S. soldier stationed in Hawaii. Sessions included a seminar on med- ical and genetic issues to consider when selecting a mate, a symposium on how to package oneself to become an attrac- tive marriage prospect and a workshop on navigating Jewish dating Web sites. Susan, a divorcee in her late 20s, said she came for one simple reason. "Let's cut to the chase," she said. "The desire to get married." Susan has met with matchmakers, gone to singles events and tried speed-dating. Still single, she hoped the one-day symposium would help her "gain a new perspective." The event was held Lincoln Square Synagogue on Manhattan's Upper West Side. Filled with young Orthodox Jews, the Upper West Side has become some- thing of a singles mecca, drawing thou- sands of young Jews seeking mates. Some say that's just the problem. "It's become acceptable to be single at an older age," said a woman named Helen. Its too comfortable to be single on some level." Nearly everybody at the conference seemed to agree that Orthodox Jews, like Jews and Americans generally, are marrying later in life. But opinions dif- fered on why Orthodox Jews were stay- ing single longer — and what could be done about it. - "Maybe they think there's somebody better around the corner," said Bonnie Keller, a mother who came to the con- ference to help others in her community meet mates or find mates for their chil- dren. 'And if they're older, maybe they say: I've been around for such a long time, should I really settle for this?" SINGLE, on page 26 This Chanukah, when you give the Detroit Jewish News as a gift, you'll get a FREE gift in return! When you give a new, in-state gift subscription to the Detroit Jewish News for 1 year (52 issues) for $56 or the special gift rate for 2 years (104 issues) for $99, you'll receive the fabulous cookbook; Eat! Enjoy! 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