For Openers Can't Live Without here is a big difference between some of "my favorite things" and things "I can't live with- out." Yet, judging from cata- logues that constantly flood the mailbox, it is hard to understand the need that exists or that we are told exists. It is not just the cost that I am objecting SY to; some are not priced all that extraordi- MANELLO narily. It's that I can't see why we are made to feel the quality of life will be enhanced Editorial by these "inventions" or lessened without Assistant them. • A wireless remote electronic locator. This item has four beeper discs to attach to keys, glasses, cell phone, TV remote or other "elusive" objects. Press a button and the corresponding disc beeps loudly (up to 30 feet). When reading this, I am reminded of my mother's sage advice: "Ifyou put things away, you'll know where they are." It also calls to mind the busy executive who, when searching for a pencil, was told by his secretary that it was behind is ear. "Which ear?" he asked. "Thrz a busy man. • A splashproof stereo CD player. This has AM/FM digital tuning for every room in the house, including the shower. It also has an alarm clock and wireless 12-function remote control. Whatever happened to singing in the shower or washing up and getting out? Are you aware that water rates are increasing? • A good companion piece for the above is the radio-controlled shower clock. It is 10 inches and easy to read "even under a stream of water." Just how long do you spend there that keeping you on schedule must come to this? • A vibrating credit card minder. This holds five cards which have electronic contacts kept apart when the wallet is closed. If closed without a card in place, the wallet vibrates. This cheap thrill costs a pretty penny; imagine what a good massage you could get if your minder, your beeper and cell phone all went , at the same time! off • An eye-trek virtual monitor. This is touted as "like watching a 62-inch flat panel, wide screen monitor from 6 1 /, feet away." It plugs into the TV, VCR or DVD, and earphones give 3D sound. We used to avoid talking by watching TV with someone; now we are encouraged to completely isolate ourselves. • For several thousand dollars, you can have an action figure doll of yourself. You send in measurements, enhancing them any way you feel, and, coupled with a photo, the company will produce a moveable action figure doll of you as a super- person. They actually send two; one is to be kept packaged and in pristine condition as a collectible; the other may be played with. This is an obvious toy for someone who has a lot of money, but needs a life. • In case you or your mate was concerned that you have stopped getting jewelry because you have no more storage space, there is a jewelry armoire. It stands 47 inches high and is made of burl -wood. Well, at least the thieves won't have to ransack the house looking for the hidden safe. • The desire for the remote-con- trolled model plane is taking a back seat to the radio-controlled Harley- Davidson replica. It runs for 20 minutes on a recharge- able battery; the remote uses three small batteries and the headlight, horn and directional signals all work. Remember the definition of success that involved the one who dies with the most toys? Hmmm. All of these remind me of a book we recently purchased for one of our grandchildren. It was called I Waaaaaant It. The moral was to teach children that they don't always need what they think they want during a trip to the store. Now, I'm not sure that the book is for children. ❑ Shabbat Candlelighting tgr:r-t'cha Don't Know © 2003 N early 2,000 people work directly for President George W. Bush in the White House and the nearby Eisenhower Executive Office Building. How many people work for Israel's President Moshe Katsav? — Goldfein -aidoad oc Apo sAoidula scn-eslEN luamsaid IETUOILIQ Ap2JEI sr alo.T s!q aST1EDQq :Jankstry ODTJJO Quotables "For us, outreach means a far different thing than it does in the Silicon Valley area. In a solid Midwest community, you have great values and traditions that are attractive to young families. We have to make sure we showcase those things we have to offer here — like a connected, supportive Jewish community." — Jan Goldstein executive director, Jewish Federation of Omaha, in the July 4 article "Lonesome Prairie: Midwest Young Head For Coasts," quoted in the Forward. Yiddish Limericks A marathon runner can't fake it, And only the fittest can take it; So I'm in a pickle. That's some hipshe shtickle.* I'm too ohsgematert** to make it. — Martha Jo Fleischmann "When I light Shabbat candles, I have an opportunity to pray for the health and welfare of my family and for peace worldwide. * (literal) considerable piece (idiomatic) long distance ** exhausted " — Sarah Kornblum, parent, Southfield Yiddish-isms zets Sponsored by Lubavitch Women's Organization. To submit a candlelighting message or to receive complimentary candlesticks and information on Shabbat candlelighting, call Miriam Amzalak of Oak Park at (248) 967-5056 or e-mail: inamzalak@juno.com 8/1 2003 10 A strong blow or punch. Candlelighting Friday, Aug. 1, 8:34 p.m. Candlelighting Friday, Aug. 8, 8:26 p.m. Shabbat Ends Shabbat Ends Saturday, Aug. 2, 9:41 p.m. Saturday, Aug. 9, 9:31 p.m. Source: From The New joys of Yiddish by Leo Calvin Rosten, edited by Lawrence Bush, copyright 2001, by the Rosten Family LLC. Used by per- mission of the Rosten Family LLC.