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Weddings, Bar/Bat Mitzvahs,
Party Invitations,
Hebrew and Hebrew Calligraphy,
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Fabulous Imprintable Papers
Printed same day

Napkins, Skull Caps, Place cards,
Sign-in Books etc.

La Mirage Center
29555 Northwestern Highway
Southfield, MI 48034

248-356-2454

Debbie Goldfine Weisserman
Maureen Weisserman Mansfield

Weddings • Showers
Bar/Bat Mitzvahs
Parties •Holidays
Special Occasions

FLORIST

29203 Northwestern Hwy. • Southfield
248.948.1055

° Doesn't Love hi

TED ROBERTS

Special to the Jewish News

by is it that a Jewish
wedding always does a
number on our heart
strings?
Even my Cousin Myra's got to me,
and that featured a garage sale chuppah
(wedding canopy) and a one-man
band blowing a kazoo.
I say it's our pessimism. Pharaoh,
Haman, Hitler, and Stalin did it to us.
Somewhere deep" down in the mid-
night of our soul, we're expecting the
Cossacks to break down the door
instead of the gentle knock of the
caterer with 300 chicken breasts
Florentine.
And we're thinking that this union
— these two young people brought
together by who knows what motive
(love, lust, economics) is our last hope
at survival.
How silly.
On an evolutionary scale, we're
tougher than the boulders of Sinai.
Me and my wife, we love a good wed-
ding. She says it takes a brit, a family
reunion and a 25th wedding anniver-
sary to equal the joy of a single mar-
riage ceremony.
That's why, last week, we drove 400
miles to .a wedding on roads that did-
n't sport a single decent deli. We
almost perished.
We lucked out. This wasn't simply a

Ted Roberts is an attorney and

freelance writer in Huntsville, Ala.

marriage ceremony. It was a seven-day
extravaganza, rich with the rewards we
out-of-town guests expect — I mean
demand. And why not. Didn't I spend
$20 on gas? Did I not spend six excru-
ciating hours in the vocal company of
three Barry Manilow CDs — my
wife's favorite tenor? Find that in our
pre-nup!
I was promised no Barry Manilow
and lots of kugel when we stood under
the chuppah years ago. Real kugel
with plenty of raisins — not Mama
Manischevitz frozen noodles.
I tried to insert it into the ketubah
(Jewish wedding certificate). My rabbi,
a straight-arrow traditionalist, refused.
Anyhow, at my cousin's wedding, I
was all set for a suitable gustatorial
payoff (maybe a kugel entree!) for my
$20 gas bill, six hours of Barry, and
our wedding gift — which we picked
up at a road-side yard sale. Really a
bargain, because contributing to the
gift were several family members who
chose not to make the trip. ("Are you
kidding: you guys and Barry Manilow
for six hours! Here, take a fiver for a
yard sale wedding gift.")

Wonderful Time

The wedding was not disappointing.
The ceremony and symbolism were
overpowering. They did it all, begin-
ning with the signing of the ketubah.
The ketubah, of course, is written in
antique Aramaic so that the groom
doesn't understand his commitment to
his wife, his in-laws and her Uncle