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Jewish Book Fair

Spiritual Quest

In the wake of Sept. 11, authors offer insights that soothe the soul.

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Living a

Life That

Matters

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HAROLD S.
KUSHNER

Rabbi Harold
Kushner has
written a book
about doing well
by doing good.

`Living A Life That Matters

T

wenty years ago, Rabbi Harold
Kushner wrote a 150-page book that
was published with little fanfare.
That "little book" not only changed
his life, but impacted the lives of the more than 4
million people around the world who read it, and
made its title, When Bad Things Happen to Good
People, part of the American vernacular.
In the past few weeks, the rabbi has been over-
whelmed with phone calls from the media, seeking
his wisdom about faith when great tragedy strikes.
"Some people give up on the world because it's
not fair," he says. "Some people will say that the
fact that so many innocent people died [on Sept.
11] proves that we can't depend on God."
For him, it shows that "we can't depend on peo-
ple without God, without a sense of morality.
But, he adds, "we can't depend on people who
misuse God as an excuse for carrying out angry,
destructive acts."
Frequently, he is asked for advice in dealing
with such enormous loss. "Don't bother asking
why," he says. Rather, he encourages people to
find the strength to go on, the way Israelis do.
"The only thing we can do is hug each other,
cherish each other.
"I feel there are some things in the world, like
[this current] tragedy, that are not God's doing.
They are the result of either amoral laws of nature
or human cruelty. God's role is not to prevent the
tragedy, but give us the spiritual resources to over-
come and survive the tragedy.
"In the past 20 years there has been a major
change in the way religion has responded to
tragedy. We explain less, we justify less, and we

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hug more. I would like to think my [first] book
had something to do with that."
This season, Rabbi Kushner is publishing a new
book, Living a Life that Matters: Resolving the
Conflict Between Conscience and Success (Alfred A.
Knopf; $22.)
It addresses the human need to find signifi-
cance. He emphasizes compassion and generosity
over competition, looking to love, friendship and
acts of kindness as essential elements of a mean-
ingful life.
The book is practical and anecdotal, with many
parallels — drawn from Hollywood movies to the
life of the biblical Jacob, who, writes the rabbi,
was perhaps actually wrestling with his conscience
as he wrestled with the angel.
Rabbi Kushner acknowledges that people some-
times are tempted to cut corners in their drive
toward success, compromising on integrity. His
voice is one of forgiveness. "Good people do bad
things," he asserts, and they're still good people,
despite some regrettable human weaknesses.
Rabbi Kushner explores the notion of revenge,
which he says is about reclaiming power after some-
one makes you feel powerless. He writes: "It is
cleansing to be able to forgive, to rid your soul of
the bitterness that is an inevitable ingredient of plot-
ting revenge against the person who has hurt you.
"If we fantasize about getting even and never
act on it, which is what most of us do, we end up
embittering ourselves and not affecting the other
person at all."
Born in Brooklyn, Rabbi Kushner, 66, graduat-
ed from Columbia University and was ordained
by the Jewish Theological Seminary. The author
of several books, including When All You've Ever
Wanted Isn't Enough, How Good Do We Have to
Be? and When Children Ask About God, he is rabbi
laureate of Temple Israel in Natick, Mass.
When asked what has mattered the most in his
own life, he replies: "What I am proudest of is
that when my son was dying, and in a great deal
of pain, I could make him laugh.
— Sandee Brawarsky

"Neshamale" ("Little Beloved Soul") has endured
for more than 55 years. The wisdom he bestowed
upon her is reflected in Dr. Remen's newest book,
My Grandfather's Blessings: Stories of Strength,
Refuge and Belonging (Riverhead Books; 524.95).
Speaking by telephone from her home in
California, Dr. Remen commented, "When we are
first touched by someone who is holy, we remem-
ber it even though we are very young. People
often underestimate their influence on small chil-
dren. My grandfather is as much a part of my
daily life now as he was when I was 6."
One of the lessons Rabbi Ziskind taught his
granddaughter was that each human being has the
power to repair the world. He did not use those
words, as a small child would not have under-
stood them. Instead he made tikkun olam clearer
by telling her: "We are all born because we can
become a blessing, Neshamele."
He made his lesson real with the gift of a small
paper cup filled with dirt and made the puzzled
child promise to water the cup every day. When,
after days of watering, the seed he had planted in
the dirt sprouted, he told the amazed child, "Life
is everywhere ... even in the most ordinary and
unexpected places."
When she asked if the water had made the plant
sprout, this wise man replied that it was her faith-
fulness, her willingness to water the cup every day
that allowed it to happen.
The little girl who would grow up to be a
physician, a professor of medicine, a master story-
teller and a counselor to those with cancer
remembers this as her first lesson in her power to
befriend life. She was 4 years old.
Remen, also the author of the bestseller Kitchen
Table Wisdom, says of My Grandfather's Blessings:
[It] is a book of true stories about tikkun olam, our

"

Rabbi Harold Kushner speaks 8 p. m. Sunday,
Nov. 11, at the Jewish Community Center in West
Bloomfield.

GRANDFATHER'S
BLESSINGS

My Grandfather's Blessings'

D

r. Rachel Naomi Remen was only 7
years old when her beloved grandfa-
ther died. But his love and his lessons
were not lost on someone so young.
Quite the contrary. Rabbi Meyer Ziskind's
influence on the child he lovingly called

Stories of Sifengli.:,

.R :fuse. and Belonging

RACHEL NAOMI REMEN.

Dr. Rachel Naomi
Remen: "Nobody
needs to lead a
meaningless life."

