COMMUNITY VIEWS

Double Minority

in our practice of the religion. But as
t is more than 50 years since the
gays and lesbians, our struggle for
horror of the Holocaust in
identity has been far more difficult.
Europe. In America, words like
When you are a gay or lesbian Jew,
"restricted" and "Jews not wel-
your discomfort is defined by your cir-
come" have gone the way of [the
cumstance. In the Jewish
movie and book] Gentleman's
community, we may not be
Agreement. Out of date and
affirmed for who we are,
out of print. And yet, with
but judged. In temple, we
Sen. Joseph Lieberman join-
can be painfully aware that
ing the Democratic ticket,
we are not welcome by the
Jews everywhere are on the
rabbi or the congregation.
alert. Already the bigots and
Acceptance within our bio-
racists are lining up.
logical family may be mea-
The recent incident with
sured, so we turn to friends
the president of the Dallas
of various religions who
chapter of the National Asso-
BRAD GRABER become our extended fami-
ciation for the Advancement
ly. People who understand
Spec ial to
of Colored People proves that
the Jew ish News that God is within our
old stereotypes never die.
acceptarlie and love for one
And I fear that there is still
another.
much more ahead. Slurs,
innuendoes and ignorance
Homophobia?
run amok. The Jews of America are in
We struggle with parents who believe
for a challenging time. And if you are
we are a result of their mistakes, and
a gay or lesbian Jew, the tension is
who are ashamed to share the truth of
almost palpable.
our lives with friends and family.
It's hard to say what is most affect-
Some are so angry they disown us, or
ing when you hold the status of being
worse, spend years reminding us of
a double minority. For gay and lesbian
their bitter disappointment. Parents
Jews, sexual orientation has certainly
who would never consider making a
been the tougher card to play.
donation to a gay organization, and
As Jews, we grow up with a sense of
who balk at the very mention of gay
community. We get the culture,
marriage, equal rights or gay pride.
though like other Jews, we may vary
Parents who might ask, "What's the
big deal? Who needs to know?" Par-
ents who insist that it's nobody's busi-
Brad Graber is a West Bloomfield
ness.
resident. His e-mail address is
As a double minority, we wonder
Jefbra@aol.com

I

how we can trust grandparents who
refer to an African American as the
shvartze? How we can feel safe with a
father who fails to confront a homo-
phobe? How we can feel affirmed by a

It's hard to say what is

most affecting when

you hold the status of

being a double
minority. For gay and

lesbian Jews, sexual

orientation has

certainly been the

tougher card to play.

mother who believes our life is less
than it could have been? As the saying
Goes "With friends like these, who
needs enemies?"
Such are the challenges that gay
and lesbian Jews face every day. The
lucky ones are embraced fully by their
families. The rest learn to live within
the shifting sands of tolerance. We

LETTERS

Recognize
Jewish Heroes

Will Nomination
Ease Tensions?

Seeing all the improvements being
made at the Jewish Community Cen-
ter in West Bloomfield is really great.
The walls being decorated with past
presidents, sports heroes and donors
are needed.
However, wouldn't it be wonderful
to have a wall at the JCC showing the
Detroit-area Jewish men who were
killed in Vietnam, Korea and World
War II? Who gave more than these
300 men? They deserve a place in the
JCC.
Larry Wiener

The designation of Sen. Joseph
Lieberman as the Democratic vice
presidential candidate should put to
rest the tension between blacks and
Jews over affirmative action ("Affirma-
tive Action Affirmed," Aug. 25, page
25), now that he is a visual and prime
benefactor of affirmative action with
his selection by Vice President Al
Gore.
Greg Thrasher

Farmington Hills

9/1
2000

38

West Bloomfield

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don't kiss in public or dance together
at weddings. We've become accus-
tomed to such limitations. Yet, we
hope someday things will change.
The reality for gays and lesbian
Jews, just like the broader community
of gays and lesbians, is that we are
lacking in the privileges that other
Americans take for granted. It is legal
to discriminate against us in matters
of housing and employment. Few
employers offer domestic partnership
benefits. Only the proper legal docu-
ments allow you access to your life
partner in an intensive care unit. And
in the event of sudden death, we are
not guaranteed control of our posses-
sions without proper estate planning.
Our life, liberty and pursuit of happi-
ness are clearly at risk.

Facing The Challenge

Now with the nomination of Joseph
Lieberman, gay and lesbian Jews are
forced once again to confront our
Jewish identities. While America
debates the impact that a Jewish run-
ning mate will have on the Gore
ticket, Jews everywhere may experi-
ence a sense of "dis-ease" as America
Goes through its evaluation. There
will be continued speculation on the
impact that a Jewish politician will
have on southern whites and African
American voters. There will be dis-
cussions on CNN, Meet the Press and
network news magazines regarding
the definition of an Orthodox Jew,
and how that plays in the political
arena. We will be challenged by the
media attention. Challenged to not
be offended as America learns about
the values and beliefs that set Jews
apart from the Christian and non-
Christian faiths.
We gay and lesbian Jews will be
increasingly aware of our status as a
double minority. We'll hang tight, along
with our Jewish family and friends,
through the roller-coaster ride of the
next two months. While America strug-
gles through its journey of Jewish self-
discovery, culminating in whether
Lieberman can be elected to the second
highest office, Jewish gays and lesbians
will also worry about civil rights, and
whether America will endorse legisla-
tion that protects us in housing,
employment and all matters surround-
ing our gay and lesbian households.
When the election is over, we will
again revisit our Jewish roots and
wonder what role the Jewish commu-
nity will play in supporting our fight
for equal rights. I hope we are not dis-
appointed.

❑

