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ences, and he affirms the stereotypes
that describe Jewish men as less physical
than non-Jews. The author says his view
applies to Ashkenazic Jews because
Reform rabbi who has spent
Sephardic men tend to be more macho.
considerable time thinking
The first definition of Jewish man-
about masculinity issues
hood, the rabbi says, was Torah rather
hopes that other Jewish men
than toughness.
will take his cue and explore the same
"[My] book came out of many dis-
subjects after reading his new book,
cussions in which
Searching for My
Jewish men have asked
Brothers: Jewish Men in
themselves what is
a Gentile World
unique about being
(Putnam's Sons; $23.95).
Jewish,
that informs
Jeffrey Salkin, senior
who
we
are as individ-
rabbi of Long Island's
uals in the day-to-day
Community Synagogue,
world," Salkin says.
is accustomed to discus-
"As I looked at my
sions of his ideas in
own life, I came to
many places including
understand how much
Michigan, where he has
my
childhood and
appeared at Jewish book
adolescence
were real-
fairs to introduce his ear-
ly
wrapped
up
in a
lier titles, Putting God on
sense of 'differentness'
the Guest List and Being
as a Jew and, with
God's Partner.
that, 'differentness' as
Although Salkin's
being a Jewish man. I
Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin: "In a
writing does not cover
Father's Day and its rele- world where fathering is such was able to look at my
life and study different
vance to the Jewish corn- a challenge, we can celebrate
who
we
are
as
fathers."
trends in Jewish histo-
munity, he relates to the
ry and see that what I
topic and is glad to
was experiencing was not unusual.
address it along with other points
"We demonstrate our masculinity
made in his latest release.
through a love of ideas and words, an
"Father's Day is one of those artifi-
infatuation with argument and intel-
cially created holidays, but in a world
lectual striving," Salkin insists. "We
where fathering is such a challenge,
show that we are men through a strict
where the family is on the ropes, we
adherence
to a moral code and living
can celebrate who we are as fathers,"
lives
of
interconnection."
says Salkin, who has two sons.
Salkin states that Zionism represents
"In Judaism, the father is a nurtur-
a movement that shatters some of the
ing father. That's the Jewish paternal
stereotypes attributed to Jewish men.
role. More than that, if you view God
"People always mention that Israel
as father — and I'm not sticking up
is a very macho culture," the rabbi
for that one way or the other — we
says. "Part of that comes from the
have to understand that God is not a
necessity of defending one's homeland
deadbeat, workaholic dad. God is a
and the blending of Ashkenazic men
nurturing father who weeps with his
with Sephardic men, who grew up
children's pain. Jewish fatherhood
with a more Mediterranean way of
means an access to emotions.
looking at life, more physicality and
"One of the things I would have
perhaps more sensuality."
liked to have written about is that
Salkin hopes his readers will gain
Judaism assigns roles to fathers. [It]
more understanding of Jewish roots of
says that a father's job is to circumcise
behavior.
his son, teach his son a trade and,
"I'd like men to understand that
some say, teach his children to swim,
Judaism has a lot to say about things
which I think is a metaphor for teach-
men think a lot about — worka-
ing all of our children about the exi-
holism, career, sexuality and aging," he
gencies of life."
says. "I want women to have a better
Salkin's opinions are based on per-
understanding of the Jewish men in
sonal interpretations of religious teach-
their lives." 0
ings combined with personal experi-

SUZANNE CHESLER
Special to the Jewish News

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