INSIDE: Jewish Chapter For Substance Abuse . 104 food health Reviews, Shows - Kick Of Summer . . . 110 the scene sports travel SHAM S. COHEN Special to the Jewish News A Southfield man and a West Bloomfield boy have a relationship that exemplifies a needed JFS program. hony Reuven is a typical, happy 9-year-old boy in many ways. He likes sports, computer games and some of his fourth-grade classes at Hillel Day School of Metropolitan Detroit; where he is a very good student. He also likes to talk about his spe- cial friend, Gary Plasko. "Gary is just a really nice guy," Shony says emphatically. Shony hap- pily describes the time Gary took him to visit a friend who is a disc jockey at radio station WOMC-FM. As a Special Friend volunteer at Jewish Family Service, Plasko is able to share the "guy things" that Shony might not do so easily with his moth- er, Denise Reuven. Plasko helps Shony practice baseball, even coming to some-of his Little League games. "I've been teaching him golf and he's got a good swing now We've gone to Detroit Tiger games, ice skat- . ing and we built a computer," says Plasko, an insurance certified life underwriter who lives in Southfield. "We see each other at least once a week, more in the summer." Denise Reuven, a single mother, heard about the JFS Special Friends through a group for children of divorced parents at Hillel. Reuven is divorced, and Shony sees his father infrequently. After she contacted JFS, Plasko was matched with Shony. "Gary visited once or twice and they just took off," says Reuven. "Gary has been a very positive male role model, which Shony needed. He has provided a lot of support for Shony. It's nice to be able to go with an older guy. "Gary helps him with reports for school. They call each other," says Reuven. Plasko brings solid experience to his role as a mentor. He is a former fifth-grade teacher who has coached hockey, baseball and soccer for more than 10 years. Now divorced, he continues to be a devoted stepfa- ther. Plasko called Southfield-based JFS because he heard they were looking for volunteers and thought it would be a nice opportunity to help another boy now that his step- son is away at school. JFS has helped establish six mentor- ing relationships and would like to expand the effort, according to Michelle Greenstein, JFS social worker and program coordinator. The children with special friends are usually between 6 and 16, typically with divorced par- ents. "The mentors range in age from their 20s to 40s, depending on the need of the child," Greenstein says. "Most of the children need a male role model. The girls often need to boost their self-esteem." All prospective volunteers go through an extensive screening process, including a criminal background check, a review of their driving record, and home assessments. Volunteers must be willing to establish a relationship for one year, preferably longer, with a corn- mitment to see the child once a week or every other week. "The volunteer needs to be someone who has the energy to do what the kids want to do and have the patience to lis- ten to them and be a confidant. Sometimes the child is dose in age to the volunteer's child," says Greenstein. The family does not need to be a single-parent situation, Greenstein adds. The child could have physical dis- abilities or emotional problems that require extra support. She stresses that the mentor is not a parent substitute but a caring adult who provides addi- tional guidance and friendship. A JFS social worker maintains contact with the volunteers and the families, and will proCide support if needed. As the program expands, JFS will provide training for both volun- teers and parents, Greenstein says. Reuven, who describes Shony as a child "who has been happy since he was born," hopes that Shony and Gary continue their friendship. "They've established quite a nice relationship together. They're good buddies. Shony thinks Gary is great," she says. "For any child who lacks a positive male role model in his life, this is won- derful. I'm really grateful for the pro- gram." ❑ ITN 6/9 2000 103