Spirituality

A multi-denominational team of rabbis
leads bereavement training for colleagues.

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The Michigan Board of
Rabbis presents a
seminar that prepares
rabbis to comfort
families facing a
child's death.

SHELLI LIEBMAN DORFMAN

Staff Writer

oping they never have to
use their new knowledge,
Michigan Board of Rabbis
members are learning how
to help families cope with the loss of a
young child;
"We all know we are going to face
these things. You pray it's not you,"
says Rabbi E.B. "Bunny" Freedman of
the Jewish Hospice and Chaplaincy
Network in Southfield. "As a rabbi, we
will be called on to provide comfort,
solace and support."
Complementing educational mate-
rials shared at a March 9 meeting,
Rabbi Freedman and Rabbis Herbert

Yoskowitz of Adat Shalom Synagogue
and Michael Moskowitz of Temple
Shir Shalom provided information
and insights with local colleagues on
April 5.
The trio attended a Nov. 30 work-
shop in New York City entitled
"When a Child Dies: Helping the
Rabbi Help."
•
"It is one of the most difficult
things we have to deal with, and any
way we can help ourselves as rabbis to
be better prepared is extremely worth-
while," says Rabbi Moskowitz. "Many
of us have dealt with this; but no mat-
ter how experienced or compassionate
you are, you can't be prepared for
tragedies like this."
At the one-day seminar in New
York, Rabbi Moskowitz was moved by
the powerful keynote speech of Dr.
Kenneth Gorfinkle, who lost his son
at age 7: "He
was able to
say, This
is what

my rabbis did for me.'"
The practical insights were "from a
vulnerable person who shared his per-
sonal experience in what did and did-
n't work, what rituals were comforting
to him, where the rabbis' presence was
meaningful," notes Rabbi Freedman.
Rabbi Moskowitz says he appreciat-
ed "just hearing what helped other
rabbis, their concerns and hearing that
you're not alone."
In breakout sessions, the rabbis had
the opportunity to focus on specific
areas, including Jewish text, sudden
death and loss in pregnancy. Rabbis
representing the Orthodox,
Conservative, Reform and
Reconstructionist movements dis-
cussed the creation of Jewish rituals
around the burial of a fetus or a child
less than 30 days old.
Such rituals are not
part of Jewish law.
Regardless of their
stances, the rab-
bis learned
from one
another,
Rabbi

Shelli Liebman Dorfman can be
reached at (248) 354-6060,
ext. 246, or by e-mail at
sdorfman@thejewishnews.com

JN

4/7
2000

76

Rabbis E.B. "Bunny" Freedman,
Herbert Yoskowitz
and Michael Moskowitz
"in New York.

,A,Zwagsmz,.m.

Freedman says. In fact, aside from the
blessings and the liturgy, he found
they shared many similarities. "One of
the things that really binds rabbis
together is pastoral work. When some-
one is ill and reaching out, pastoral
care is pretty universal stuff— the
common denominator," he says.
Rabbi Freedman is director of the
Michigan Board of Rabbis Chaplaincy
and Pastoral Education and
Enrichment Program. He says future
seminars will focus on end-of-life
issues and children with chronic and
terminal illness. A 4'/-hour workshop
is planned in May on disaster pre-
paredness.
The New York workshop was co-
sponsored by the New York Board of
Rabbis, the UJA Federation of New
York and the Jewish Board of Family
and Children's Services of New York.
The locally based seminars are sup-
ported by the Michigan
Board of Rabbis and a
grant from the Jewish
Fund (established with
proceeds from the sale
of Sinai Hospital by
the Jewish Federation
of Metropolitan
Detroit).❑

