Community

Mazel Toy!

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LISA BARSON
Special to the Jewish News

T

o prepare for her bat mitzvah,
Orchard Lake Middle School
student Michelle Unger had
to perform a mitzvah project.
The West Bloomfield girl didn't
know that the project would become
her hobby and passion, and would
inspire others.
Michelle and a friend heard about
volunteer oppOrtunities with the
Friendship Circle. Though many months
before her own bat mitzvah, she went
with her friend to an informational party
because she thought the group would be
interesting enough to enable her to corn-
plete the required 18 hours of service.
She listened as parents described how
much their special-needs children
enjoyed their few hours with the
Friendship Circle volunteers. They also
described how much it meant to the
parents to have time to run errands or
do chores, knowing their children were
in good hands.
Michelle was surprised that many of
the volunteers were Orthodox girls. The

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Friendship Circle was originally formed
in affiliation with the Michigan
Lubavitch Foundation.
Having been raised at Temple Kol
Ami, Michelle had little exposure to
the Orthodox community. But after
hearing the stories and seeing the chil-
dren, Michelle was hooked on the
Friendship Circle.
She agreed to volunteer, and attended
a seminar to learn about special-needs
children. She heard therapists and par-
ents describe the best ways to react to
the demands of special-needs kids. She
decided to work with 4-7-year-olds.
She volunteers from 1-4 p.m. on
Sundays. The volunteers take the chil-
dren swimming, read stories, and play
games. They also accompany the chil-
dren and their parents on field trips,
most financed through ongoing
fundraising.
Michelle says volunteering is a simple
way to "make you feel like you really
make someone else's day.
She quickly befriended many of the
volunteers and children. One child in
particular stole Michelle's heart.
Although 7 years old, bright-eyed Jamie

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Karp cannot speak, has difficulty walk-
ing, and is very small for her age.
Michelle visits the girl at her home once
a week after school, in addition to the
Sunday sessions, to give Jamie's mother a
chance to unwind, prepare dinner and
run errands.
Michelle never gets paid for her time.
"That's not the point," she says. "The
point is to help someone out." However,
she receives ample compensation when
Jamie laughs and smiles.
Michelle's involvement in the
Friendship Circle has inspired her
younger sister, Samantha. Although only
11, Samantha wanted to volunteer as
well. The founder and director of the
Friendship Circle, Bassie Shem Tov, was
reluctant to have such a young girl par-
ticipate.
Michelle's mother, Renee, convinced
the organization that Samantha was
mature and responsible, so Shem Toy
allowed her to try. Three months later,
Shem Tov cannot believe she ever ques-
tioned Samantha's capability.
Michelle Unger has no intention of
quitting her assignment 18 months —
not hours — after she started, and more

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than a month after her bat mitzvah.
"I was scared the first time I went," says
Michelle. "I didn't know many people
and I didn't know what to expect from
the children. But to see the kids smile
because they are having fun is some-
thing that gives me a sense of fulfill-
ment.
"Seeing the relief on the faces of the
parents makes me realize I'm making a
difference," she says.
Michelle has also befriended many of
the other volunteers, including many
Orthodox girls.
"I've learned to be more patient, and
I've learned to accept that we all have
differences," explains Michelle.
The most important lesson, she says,
is that deep down, children are children,
and teenagers are teenagers, regardless of
the labels put on them by society. H

The Friendship Circle has 250
volunteers, both boys and girls,
ages 12-18. For information, visit
the Web site at
www.friendshipcircle.org-