For Openers

Adam Sandler's Rabbi

Yiddish Limericks

JASON A. MILLER
Special to the Jewish News

A shepherd's son said, "I resent it!
My fortune's gone, though I've not spent it.
Alas, father's dead.
Who knew when he said
He's leaving me bobkehs*, he meant it?!"

T

he president has his advisers; the pope has a confes-
sor. Why are we not surprised then that a local rab-
binical student could become Adam Sandler's
rabbi?
Recently, I met
Adam Sandler. He is
filming his new movie
Little Nicky in the New
York area. We spoke
for a little while and he
told me to come back
and we could shmooze
during his lunch break.
(I invited him to the
seminary for lunch but
he respectfully
Jason A. Miller with Adam Sandler
declined).
in New York.
When I went back,
Sandler's head of secu-
rity was stopping people from getting close to Adam. When
Adam spotted me, he said, "Rabbi Jason's okay; let him in."
We talked for a little bit and I promised to return with a
gift after lunch. I ordered two copies of Adam's latest movie,
Big Daddy, on videotape from the Internet to be delivered to
my apartment. Then my roommate and I took the tapes and
headed back to the set.
After Adam signed the tapes for us, I presented him with a
Jewish Theological Seminary kippa. He quickly put it on over his
Little Nicky wig. Adam promised us that when he gets married,
both my roommate and I would co-officiate at his wedding.
When I went back the next morning on my way to class,
Adam said, "Hey, Rabbi." Then we took a picture together
and, as I was leaving, he yelled out, "Be in touch and thanks
for the yarmulke."
As an interesting footnote, I was recently a visiting rabbini-
cal student at a synagogue in Virginia and told the story to
the rabbi. On Saturday morning, I was introduced to the con-
gregation as "Adam Sandler's Rabbi Jason Miller." This made
me instantly popular with all the pre-pubescent boys.

Jason A. Miller, son of Gary and Bobbie Miller of West
Bloomfield, is a second-year rabbinic student at the Jewish
Theological Seminary of America in New York City.

GRAMM

* (idiomatic) beans, peanuts, nothing
(literal) sheep or goat droppings
— Martha Jo Fleischmann

Quotables

"Like many of you, I am
Orthodox.
— George Stephanopoulos, who is
Greek Orthodox and former senior
adviser to President Bill Clinton,
speaking at the Yeshiva Beth
Yehudah annual dinner in Detroit.

"As a Jewish athlete, I think it's
important to interact with the
fans. And the Dodgers, of
course, have a rich tradition
with [Hall of Famed Sandy
Koufax."
— All-Star outfielder Shawn
Green, who was traded by the
Toronto Blue Jays to sign a six-
year, $84-million contract with George Stephanopoulos
the Los Angeles Dodgers, on
why he wanted to be traded to
an area with a large Jewish population.

"Here, we blame Yigal Amin But it isn't that simple. It
is much deeper and much more complex."
Dalia Rabin-Pelosoff on unresolved questions regard-
ing the 19.95 assassination of her father, Israeli Prime
Minister Yitzhak Rabin.

"I want to thank you for coming tonight. My mother is
here, my sister, my uncle . . . in fact, I feel like this is
my bar mitzvah."
— Director Barry Levinson, in Baltimore at the world
premiere of his latest film, "Liberty Heights."

BY Mendel

TC1.1 me A // ON GE UPON A
MEPtNIN6Ful.. TIME THERE WAS
srowy,PA172.9 A POOR KING MAO
PROMISED TO
MARRY - OFF HIS
BEAUTIFUL PAUGHTER
TO THE RICHEST MAN
IN THE LA/op „ ."

THE9 SEARCHED AND WHEN
FOUND THE RiO-iEsT MAN
THE 12AUG/-4TCR WAS WED. TH E
KING MOVED IN WITH THE COUPLE,
PA-IP-OFF HIS CAP LOANS, AND
LIVED NA PPlLY

EVER R FreR

((

Do YOU KNOW WHAT THE
MORAL OF THE SToRY IS ?
UM, THAT IT'S
FPAiJK) CAN
A GooD THIN
WE TALK F
THAT 0() NEVER

BECAME A RABBI?.

Celebrate Chanukah
in a most meaningful way...
by sharing the gift of giving

Tzedakah Box Drop Off
Chanukah Party
Tuesday, December 7
4:30 to 6:30 p.m.

JARC Office
28366 Franklin Road
Southfield

Return the Tzedakah Box
you received at the
Lily Tomlin show —
Refreshments, games
and fun for all ages
(especially the kids!)

Drop by for a few minutes
on December 7th —
it'll be worth your time!

Need a JARC Tzedakah Box?
NO PROBLEM
Call the JARC Tzedakah Box Hotline
at 248-352-5277, ext. 418
We'll send you one!

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www.jarc.org

12/3
1999'

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