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9/3
1999

2111

administered programs.

Deiroit kawish NPIA/S

failed to do in the last 15 years has
y the time this article
been to examine what works for me.
appears, the impending end
I have been so busy making deci-
of summer will be upon us.
sions
and working out schedules for
Trepidation at the return
others
— whether at work or at
to the flurry of fall activities and
home
—
that I have never really
schedules will have crept back into our
tried new things. For the past 15
minds.
years, my motto has been
Today, however, I am
"one day at a time." That
writing this article upon my
phrase
works for TV shows
return from my first rock-
and
for
people who are
climbing experience in
questioning
their ability to
Devil's Lake, Wisc. No, it
even
get
out
of bed in the
was not intended to be my
morning.
But
I believe that
ideal summer vacation; nor
it also prevents us from
was I even excited about
dreaming and setting and
going. But being a member
striving for goals that are
of the faculty at Olin-Sang-
beyond the here and now.
Ruby Union Institute in the
FRANCES B.
In recent years, I have
Moshavah unit, it was just
PEARLMAN
utilized
the summer as an
part of the deal. After all,
Special
to
unofficial
new year by set-
how do you say no when 28
the Jewish News
ting what I like to call a
Jewish adolescents are asking,
" generic goal" to do some-
"Which trip are YOU on,
thing
new — to try some-
Fran?"
thing
I
have
never
tried.
I chose what I thought would be
The
annual
cycle
of the Jewish
the least intimidating trip and the one
holidays
is
a
natural
for change, for
in which I could possibly fade into the
renewal,
for
trying
new
things and
background. After all, how could I put
for
meeting
new
challenges.
I prefer
on that harness and helmet in front of
not
to
call
them
New
Year's
resolu-
everyone? Most people would assume
tions because I believe that they go
that my idea of camping is a Holiday
beyond the diet that lasts only three
Inn with room service.
weeks
or the latest Richard Sim-
But believe it or not, not showering
mons'
exercise
program. But Rosh
for three days and participating in
HaShana
and
Yom
Kippur offer we
what the '90s call "low-impact camp-
Jews
a
unique
opportunity
for self-
ing" (that means, our camping experi-
renewal.
They're
a
time
—
in fact, a
ences attempt to impact as little as
command
—
for
us
to
look
within
possible on the natural environment)
ourselves
and
get
in
touch
with
our
was an experience. that far surpassed
own
souls.
my expectations. It was incredible.
As single Jewish parents, we need -
Not only was I invigorated by the out-
to
let the beginning of a new Jewish
doors, but I also succeeded in meeting
year
become our annual reminder
a personal challenge. I did something
that we have to take time for our-
different — something just for me —
selves. I certainly do not mean to
for my own physical and spiritual
imply that we ignore the needs,
health.
physical
or emotional, of our chil-
Being a single parent for 15 years
dren,
but
we must also keep in mind
with three children ages 22, 20 and
that
we
are
modeling something very
15, it has proven to be rather diffi-
important
for
our children when we
cult to find time for me. Most often
set
goals
and
express
personal aspira-
I have found myself in a place as a
tions.
caretaker. I like things to work and
As the year 5760 peeks around the
work well. What I think I have
corner, we single Jewish mothers need
to step outside our role as parents, as
Frances B. Pearlman is director of
organizers and caregivers, to take a
education at Temple Israel and a past
step into the unknown, to reach
national board member of the Coalition
beyond the daily routine and the com-_
for the Advancement of Jewish Educa-
fort of the familiar. Judaism teaches
tion.
that the value of life is supreme. It is
up to each of us to enhance and
This article originally appeared in Sin-
enrich the quality of that life to fulfill
gle Scoop, a publication of the South-
God's command.
field-based Institute for Single Jewish
I wish each of you a shana tova and
Parents and is reprinted with permission
strength and courage in your new
of the author.
endeavors. fl