The Daycliance Approach
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/--
he ordered. "No heroic measures
should be taken to save that thing.
When it finally dies, put a 'Do Not
Resuscitate' order on it and move on."
Pausing, he added, "It's just a
radio."
"That's easy for you to say," I
responded. "You're not the one dri-
ving around singing La Vida Loca to
yourself like a jackass, reaching over to
turn on the radio that isn't there."
Twisting the air to activate an
amputated radio seemed a perfect
reflection of the futility of ever getting
my affairs in order. What bothered me
wasn't so much the radio or the car or
the mystery rash, but the fact that life
seems to be overwhelmed by such
details. Just when one leak is stopped,
another one sprouts.
In this endless onslaught of minutiae,-
how can one live a spiritual life? Where
is the room for gratitude or grace or
grand thoughts with so many details to
attend to and doctor appointments to
make and keep and parking tickets to
pay and calls to return? How can you
find meaning in life when you're always
just piecing together the things that
have fallen apart?
"You can reframe any situation,"
said a friend, an Orthodox woman
about my age who always seems fo
have the most impossibly positive out-
look. "Maybe God took your radio,
and it's up to you to find out why.
"Personally, I never listen to the
radio. I find driving alone in silence is
a gift, a time to think and reflect."
I could have predicted that one, I
think. But as I dismiss her ridiculous-
ly cheery response, I'm also fascinated
by it. I study the placid expression on
her face with envy.
"Meaning is something you choose
to see," she added. "Someone who
sees a spiritual world sees the possibil-
ity for meaning in everything."
"What's so spiritual about car
repairs and dry cleaning?" I asked,
thinking this ought to be good.
"I always make sure to say 'Thank
you, sir' when I take in my dry clean-
ing and to sincerely appreciate that
person and the work they do." Then
she stopped: "Is that eczema on your
hands?"
"Yes, I think it is," I say, wondering
how she knew.
"I get that, too. Try rubbing some
Cetaphil on it," she suggested.
I do. And it seems to work. The
rough patches start to smooth into
something pink and almost normal. If
things are going to fall apart, I think,
any salve will do. 7_
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1999
.Detroit Jewish News1.33