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August 13, 1999 - Image 17

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Detroit Jewish News, 1999-08-13

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

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Helping
Children Cope

DIANA LIEBERMAN

StaffWriter

E

vents such as Tuesday's shooting in
the North Valley Jewish Community
Center in Los Angeles are difficult
enough for adults to comprehend.
Children are affected even more seriously.
The best approach to help children
cope is to give honest answers, as
appropriate for their age, said David
Techner of the Ira Kaufman Chapel in
Southfield.
Techner, who counsels children
about the realities of death, said that
with very young children, the goal is
to reassure them, as much as possible,
about their own safety.
A parent might honestly say, "I
don't know why this thing happened.
This must be a man with a sick mind."
However, adults must emphasize
that "we can't let sick guys like this
win," Techner said.

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Your accountant will

"If you hide, you are
giving them victory

— Rabbi Steven Weil

"We must continue to live and seek
our safety," he said. "But we just can't
put ourselves in a bubble. When
Northwest Flight 255 crashed in New
York, did anyone stop flying? When
you see a car accident, do you then
drive to work?"
Children will feel more in control if
they reach out to those who are hurt-
ing, said Rabbi Steven Weil of Young
Israel of Oak Park. He suggested writ-
ing letters, sending cards or donating to
a fund for the people who wereinjured.
"They have to know anti-Semitism
exists," Rabbi Weil said.
Saying someone is crazy lets them
off the hook, he said. "Anti-Semitism
is not a sudden burst of craziness. It
can be espoused by sane people.
But, unlike other times in history,
Rvhen governments have been in
league with hatred, our government is
against prejudice.
"The best way to combat some-
thinc, like this is to stand up for your-
self," he said. "If you hide, you are
giving them victory.
"The way not to be vulnerable is to
stand up and be proud." I

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1999

Detroit Jewish News

17

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