The BiG StorY

The Lerman-Sinkoff family acknowledges each child's individual interests.

"We've also learned to include
each of their friends in our family
life. When we take family trips, we
invite another family with children of
similar ages to go along. It keeps
everyone busy and makes it nice
for each person to have someone
to relate to.
"Even for Friday-night dinners, the
children's friends are always wel-
come in our house. By making the
children's friends a part of the expe-

rience, it's more enjoyable for them
to stay at home and enjoy each
other as a family."
"Tracie is a big influence on
Bradley," Linda adds. "Often, her
ideas are what help keep the two
younger boys interested in our fami-
ly activities. She can explain the
benefits of holidays and Friday-night
services on a sibling level, in ways
they can relate to. They look up to
her."

When the Goldmans, who
belong to Congregation Shaarey
Zedek, made their sukka this past
year, everyone found a part in the
family project.
Bradley was interested in the tools
and the mechanics of building the
foundation. Tracie liked decorating
the walls and helping her mom pre-
pare food for the celebration.
David found interest in the whole
process.
"From tandem bike rides to our
traditional Jewish customs, we keep
everyone involved by doing a lot of
activities together as a family," the
Goldmans say.
For the Lerman-Sinkoff family of
West Bloornfield, flexibility is the
key to balancing a family with
children of varying ages. Their
oldest son Ari is an 1 8-year-old
freshman at the University of
Michigan; Dov is 11, and Sarah
is 8. Parents Ruth Lerman and
Mark Sinkoff belong to Congre-
ation B'nai Moshe.
"The dynamics are always chang-
ing in our household," Ruth says.
From year to year, "we must be flex-
ible with our children's changing
needs. With the 10-year difference
be-ween the oldest and youngest,

the dynamics can get quite differ-
ent."
With Ari away at school for part
of the year, the Lerman-Sinkoff chil-
dren are not usually all at home at
the same time. So the scenarios
change, depending on which chil-
dren are there.
"When Sarah is not home, leav-
ing the two older ones, the dis-
cussions tend to get more intelli-
gent and mature," Ruth says. "On
the other hand, when Ari is away
and it is just the two younger
ones, a more youthful activity
takes place."
"Each child is an individual, and
with the age differences their inter-
ests are diverse," Mark says.
"Ari's love is music, while Dov is
strong into computers, and Sarah is
crazy for Legos. Willing to get
involved and join in each separate
activiy is very important. Both Ruth
and I take the time to share with
them on their individual levels."
The presence of grandparents
Sam and Lillian Lerman and Ethel
and Saul Sinkoff encourages partici-
pation from the children like nothing
else, Ruth adds. "Having the grand-
parents around is like magic for our
children."

Get I nvolved

Elizabeth Applebaum
AppleTree Editor

Synagogue: Congregation Beth

Name: Marvin and Jan Wanetick

Professionally Speaking: Jan teach-

Residence: Southfield

Children: Sala, 10

Francine, 6
Natalie, 6
The girls attend Bingham Farms Ele-
mentary School

5/21
1999

76 Detroit Jewish News

Shalom

es special education in Detroit.
Marvin is a claims representative
for Social Security.
How They Met: "We were fixed
up," says the former Jan Goldstein.
"We dated for the summer, then
Marvin went out of town for several
years" and the two lost touch.

When he returned to Detroit, Mar-
vin chanced to run into the same
woman UN copy editor Esther All-
weiss Tschirhart) who had intro-
duced him to Jan. She encouraged
him to call Jan. Again.

Where They Married: At the Royal

Eagle in Indian Village, a Polish
restaurant. Jan explains, "I wanted
something unique, and at the time I
didn't have as much interest in

Judaism as I do now. I was really a
three times-a-year Jew then."

How They Got Involved In The
Jewish Community: When the

Waneticks married, they joined
Congregation Beth Shalom. As a
irl, Jan had limited involvement
with Judaism, but her husband's
family was more observant. When
the Waneticks became pregnant
with their first child, they wanted to