Century Theati -es

The Geni

Gem Theatre

kids, and at one point in the play
wonders if it is a function of "crazy
moms, neurotic moms, Jewish moms,
ban-the-bomb moms.
Certainly the play mirrors the reali-
ty of her life. Grody was born in Los
Angeles, came to New York to act in
theater and niet Patinkin in 1978,
when both were working in the same
ensemble. She was 35 years old when
she had her first child.
"Like a lot of people of my genera-
tion" — she's currently 51 — "I always
figured there was time, I'd get around
to having kids." And there was some
vague notion that she and Mandy
would split the parenting. Some
weeks he'd be on the road leaving
her in charge of the home front —
and, importantly, vice versa.
But as so often happens, "the man
has to give priority to his career."
Patinkin's career took off; hers did not.
But she liked being a mom, an emo-
tion that "didn't fit into my feminist
construct before I became a mother."
In a sense she was frustrated. There
were still creative juices that had to be
released, but her children's needs left
little energy or time for anything else.
And if she'd set time aside to do some
work or meet an adult friend as she
does in the play, Patinkin often called,
detained by a last-minute meeting. Yet
she was also bewildered, because she
didn't mind as much as remnants of her
feminism thought she should.
It was this ying and yang of child
rearing — loving it, not understand-
ing why and, of course, being Jewish,
feeling guilty for enjoying it — that is
at the heart of the play. And her life.
She says she can't be resentful of her
situation because "in a lot of ways it
was my own choice. I certainly have
longings. I certainly envy friends who
can manage better than I can."
So instead of performing, Grody
turned to writing, and this play was
successfully produced at New York's
Public Theater in a slightly different
version in 1990. Then she put it away.
"I had no intention of doing it
again, but a year ago some very deter-
mined young women producers asked
if I would do it at a festival of
women's plays." Then Patinkin got her
to do it again — when he was not giv-
ing his "Mamaloshen" concerts.
Ah, yes, Mandy. The irony is, of
course, that she cannot do an interview
about her play and child rearing with-
out the subject of Patinkin coming up.
"Yes," she says, in a tone of a
revival meeting response to a tent
minister, "that is true. -
And you resent that, don't you?

The Hit Musical Comedy

"Yes!"
Looks like we have an. Enquirer
story after all.
But Grody breaks the euphoria.
Patinkin, of course, played Dr. Jeffrey
Geiger in the first season of the TV
series "Chicago Hope" and quit at the
end of the year because he didn't have
enough time to spend with his family.
It turns out Grody's not angry with
her husband for getting all the credit
but with the media for giving it to
him. "The media couldn't get over the
fact that a guy would make this
choice. Women sacrifice their careers
all the time, but because a guy does it,

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Grody's husband, Mandy Patinkin,
received accolades for something
women have done forever"

it seems like a miracle."
Patinkin loved the TV job but saw
that time with his children — then 11
and 5 — was running out. The family
was in the final stages of moving to
L.A.— and even put down a deposit
on a school for the kids — but after
putting together a plus and minus list,
New York it was.
Even though that happened four years
ago, Grody gets "ticked off" that people
don't get it. Her husband was getting
accolades "for something women have
done forever." Even modern women.
"I think that's what I tried to show
in the play, that you can't be a mom
today without having ambivalence and
being tugged. We grew up wanting to
do a lot of things. I think even success-
ful women today with kids have guilt.
If they spend too much time at work,
they feel guilty; and if they spend too
much time at home, they feel guilty"
Hey, its all in a mom's life.

A poignant, warm
and romantic
play featuring
Sol Freider.

JCC • Aaron DeRoy Theatre

Kathryn Grody returned to her
mom's life" on Monday, when
her one-woman show ended its
New York run. A tour of the show
is planned, said a spokesman at
the Arc Light Theater, although at
press time, no specific dates or
cities were available.

"

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1999

Detroit Jewish News

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