Learning A Lesson
About Impressions

D

SARA GOTTLIEB
Special to The Jewish News

id you ever try to make a
good impression on some-
one special in your life?
Why is it that every
time I meet that someone, I am
caught off guard? Perhaps I'm late for
a carpool and did not take the oppor-
tunity to look myself over quickly in
the mirror; or my car is in the shop
and I am driving a neighbor's old
jalopy.
It might happen on one of those
days when the children are home
with the flu. I may have been up all
night with a crying infant and walk-
ing around the next day in a daze.
To put it mildly, by then I don't
know whether I am coming or
going.
b.
So the doorbell rings. Should I
answer it or run and hide? Before I
have time to decide, my four curious
youngsters head to the window and
peek outside. An old school chum
smiles and waves at them. I have no
choice now; she knows I am there. I
open the door and invite her in.
My friend is wearing high heel
shoes and tons of makeup, a tailored
suit and frilly blouse. If it weren't a
Wednesday morning, I would think
she is on her way to a wedding. I am
wearing an old faded robe and tattered
house slippers; the children are run-
ning around in pajamas. Cereal bowls
line the table, half filled, half spilled.
Get the picture?
I wonder why she didn't call first.
She says it was a spur-of-the-moment
decision. She is visiting from out of
town and it was now or never for
another few years.

Sara Gottlieb is a writer who lives in
Oak Park.

lowz By You

I couldn't help but think that
another few years sounded a lot better.
By then the children would be grown
and I'd have time to look in the mir-
ro r.
I ask my friend to have a cup of
coffee, praying silently that I will find
two clean mugs.
Before long, she says it is time to
go. Will I ever see her again? Right
now I'm not sure if I could face her.
I make a resolution to get dressed
the first thing in the morning from
now on, even if I am up half the night
with a newborn. I'll get the children
-
dressed early as well, or at least put
them to sleep with their clothes on —
just kidding.
For the next few weeks, I do get
dressed early. The children are dressed
before breakfast, their spotless outfits
topped with freshly laundered bibs
that can be removed easily on short
notice. I even straighten up the house
before my first cup of coffee.

And you know what? I find myself
waiting for the doorbell to ring, but
no one comes.
Throughout the day I can find no
one to impress. Doesn't that just fig-
ure? 7

YthS61 meric§s

Several contributors sent the fol-
lowing list, found on the Internet.
Things A Jewish Mother
Would Not Say
1. Be good and on Chanukah I'll get
you a BB gun.
2. How on earth can you see TV sit-

The judge told a gonif* named
Harris,
"We've heard all your liggen,**
so spare us.
You're going to jail.
Last time you skipped bail
From Pesach 'til Shmini
Atzeres!"

* thief
** lies

ting so far back?
3. Don't bother wearing a jacket, the
wind chill will improve.
4. I think a cluttered bedroom is a
sign of creativity.
5. Just leave the lights on, it makes
the house more cheery.
6. Could you turn the music up loud-
er so I can enjoy it, too?
7. Run and get the scissors! Hurry!
8. I don't have a tissue with me so use
your sleeve.
9. The curfew is a general time to
shoot for. It's not like I'm watching
the clock or anything.
10. Well, if Timmy's mom says it's
okay, that's good enough for me.

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by Martha Jo Fleischmann

Topping The Charts

Fans of Letterman or not, everyone
seems to have a Top Ten List. These may
be annoyances or frustrations or obser-
vations of goings on in society. Send your
lists to Sy Manello:
smanello @thejewishnews. corn or fax to
(248) 354-6069. Please make sure your
list is in good taste. We reserve the right to
edit or r ej ect items.

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1999

Detroit Jewish News

5

