For Openers...

Changing Names:
A Jewish Who's Who

"The Names They Are A-Changing:
Welcome to another edition of
pop quiz: which of the fol-
112 Real Names of Famous People"
'Lawrence Zeiger Live, here on CNN.
lowing celebrities in this
and learn not only who's who, but also
My special co-host for the evening,
imaginary television scenario
who was formerly who, before they
from '60 Minutes,' is Myron Wallace.
bear the names their parents
became a new who.
"Our guests represent many
lovingly bestowed upon
Of course, maybe with the advent
sectors of the entertainment
them?
of "Goldberg," more of our co-reli-
industry, from actors
"Welcome to another edi-
gionists will decide to retain the
Winona Horowitz, Jill
tion of 'Larry King Live,'
names spoken over their cradles. Will
Oppenheimer, Leonard
here on CNN. 1\4 special
they still ger the respect they desire?
Rosenthal and Walter
co-host for the evening, from
Ask Jacob Cohen. Also known as Rod-
Matuschanskayasky, to
'60 Minutes,' is Mike \Val-
ney Dangerfield.
singers Sidney Leibowitz,
lace.
Carole Klein and Barry Alan
Our guests represent
Pincus. Also funnymen
many sectors of the enter-
Jerome Silberman and Irwin
tainment industry, from
RABBI BOB
Knilberg; magician DaVid
actors Winona Ryder, Jill St.
ALPER
by Martha Jo Fleischmann
Kotkin; conductor Michael
John, Tony Randall and Wal-
Special to The
Thomashevsky; and designer
ter Matthau, to singers Steve
Jewish News
Richard Klein. Plus heavy-
There once was a father
Lawrence, Carole King and
named Goff
weight champion wrestler
Barry Manilow. Also funny-
Who said, "Son,
Goldberg. —
men Gene Wilder and Alan King;
I don't mean to scoff,
1 gleaned this information from a
magician David Copperfield; conduc-
But quick! Grab your gotkes,*
fascinating new volume ; The Jewish
tor Michael Tilson Thomas: and
Mom's frying lat-kes,'
Book of L.i:rs by Joel Samberg (Citadel
designer Calvin Klein. Plus heavy-
It's got chapters such as
The smoke alarm's
Press. i
weight champion wrestler 'Goldberg.
bound to go off'
The .Tummlers: The 116 Funniest
Which ones kept their names
the World," and
Jews
Only Goldberg. William Goldberg,
* long underwear
Jewww.weird.com: 10 Unusual Jew-
to be specific. Thar 's the name my col-
"* traditional Chanukah potato
ish Web Sires to Kvetch About."
itague, Rabbi Charles Sherman, recit-
pancakes fried in oil
Particularly enlightening is the
ed years ago when he invited a 13-
chance to flip through the pages of
year-old to read Torah at his bar mitz-
vah at Temple Israel, Tulsa. This same
kid Avent on to an outstanding career
in college and NFL football and then
became a professional wrestler known.
simply, as , - Goldberg. - The crowds
"Before I made the film. I was judged and found guilty — as if a comedian
adore him, chanting "Goldberg, Gold-
doesn't have the right or the necessary sensibilities to make a film about the
bera Goldberg - while their hero saun-
Holocaust.
ters into the arena, smoke bellowing
Italian stand-up comic and filJnmaker Roberto Benigni,
from his florin., nostrils.
whose
Holocaust
"lable," "La Vita E Bella" ("Life Is Beautiful"),
And the other celebs? Weil. they all
won
major
awards at Cannes and other film festivals.
changed their monikers. This is how
the introduction would sound if
\\:/e don't want to hospitalize people from all over the world. As soon as some-
everyone had stuck \\H&J hi, or her
one
is diagnosed, we will send them home as quickly as possible."
original:
-- Israeli Health Ministry official Michael Dor, on government plans to place
v.)';
, chiatriscs Jerusalem, Nazareth and Tiberias in the year 2000 to deal with
Rabbi Bob Alper is a stand-up con/n-
psychologically unstable religious tourists obsessed with the millennium.
and author

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Detroit Jewish News

12/18

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