For Openers...

A Chanukah Quiz
From The Latke Maven

to rout the Greek-Syrian armies from
went on strike
n early Chanukah present
the Beit Hamikdash and Eretz Yisrael,
3. The real reason behind the con-
that my wife and I bought
with God's help
sumption of vast quantities of latkes
each other was a computer.
b) the winning touchdown by "Big
and deep-fried sufganiyot on
Though I still have a life
Al" Hanissim, quarterback of the
Chanukah is to:
(translate: I am not spending
Modi'in Hammers football team in
a) Remind us of the mir-
every waking moment at the
the
Matzah Bowl championship
acle of the oil lasting eight
keyboard), I have found
the legendary Alan H. Nissim,
c)
days, which is coincidentally
some fun things to share.
public accountant to the Sages, the
the length of time it will
Here then, in time for the
first person to successfully challenge
take to burn off the excess
holiday, is a recent gleaning
an IRS ruling
calories through continuous
from the Internet.
Have a freilich Chanukah. [I
running on the treadmill
Take a break from all that
b) Build up sufficient fat
Latke frying, put up your feet
reserves to last us through
and see if you can correctly
the long winter, which usu-
answer this special Chanukah Sy MANELLO
ally ends sometime around
Quiz:
Editorial Assistant Shavuot
L On Chanukah, we
by Martha Jo Fleischman
c) Use up the 10 extra
commemorate the victory of
pounds of matzah meal you bought
the Hashmonayim over the Syrian-
"You'll have to be careful now,
last Pesach
Greeks and the rejection of 'assimila-
Hector,"
4. Yehudah Maccabee's other broth
tion by:
Once cautioned the fire inspector.
ers were:
a) Lighting a special menorah at
mean no kein ayin harahs,*
a) Yonatan, Yochanan, Eliezer and
night in oui front windows, eating
But forty menorahs?**
Shimon
and gambling for nuts
You're
quite a fahbrenteh*** col-
Larry,
Curly,
Moe
and
Shepp
b)
b) Buying elaborate, expensive gifts
lector!"
c) Jerry, George, Kramer and New-
for all of our family, friends and
man
acquaintances
* evil eyes (literal)
5. The Al Hanissim prayer recited
c) Donating a really lovely bronze
had luck (idiomatic)
in daily tefillot and Birkat Hamazon
plaque and hosting a community gala
** ritual candelabras for
on Chanukah, which mentions the
I dinner in honor of the Hashmonayim
Chanukah
victory of the few over the many,
family
***
burning
(literal)
refers to: •
2. There was only a single vial of
ardent (idiomatic)
a) the ability of a small group of
olive oil left for the menorah in the
untrained, ill-equipped Jewish soldiers
Beit HaMikdash because:
a) Upon cleaning out the defiled
Temple, there was only one vial of oil
found that was fit for use
b) The price of olive oil on the She-
men
Index in the Asian Futures spot
I was raised as a Democrat. Not till I started thinking did I become Conserva-
L_,
market had recently climbed and the
tive.
local oil broker was waiting for a drop
—Political consultant, commentator and GOP campaign strategist Mary Matal-
to buy
in (wife of James Carville) at Sunday's Temple Israel Speakers Forum.
c) The Temple management
switched over to a just-in-time deliv-
"Rabbi, I think we've got a minyan here today."
ery system just as the postal service
—Political advisor, author and architect of Bill Clinton's 1992 presidential

A

Yiddish Limericks

SHIFT
INTO
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GEAR

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‘- 7

Quotables

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also at the Temple Israel Speakers Forum.

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12/11

1995

Detroit Jewish News

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