For Openers...

DISABILITY
CAN
TOUCH
ANY FAMILY.

A Little Knowledge
Is A Humorous Thing

because the machine that makes them
hen in doubt, look it up.
looks like it's kissing the conveyor
According to the dictio-
belt.
nary (well, that's better
The phrase "rule of thumb" is
than starting "They say
derived from an old English
that ..."), the suffix "-old"
law that stated you couldn't
means "like or resembling as
beat your wife with any-
in crystalloid or metalloid."
thing wider than your
Therefore, the following
thumb.
interesting, true and little-
The name "Jeep" came
known statements are fac-
from the abbreviation used
toids — resembling facts. I
in the army for the "G.P."
also acknowledge the contri-
(General Purpose) vehicle.
butions made by Roz Fink of
The Pentagon in Arling-
Northville who knows my
ton, Va., has twice as many
propensity for such
SY MANELLO
bathrooms as is necessary.

VIT

narishkeit.

llowz By You

120WG

Now or in
the future.

Editorial Assistant

The sentence "the quick
brown fox jumps over the "-
lazy dog" uses every letter in the
alphabet. This was developed by West-
ern Union to test telex/TWX commu-
nications, but is absolutely wasted on
those of you who never knew the
typewriter.
The average life span of a major
league baseball is seven pitches.
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and
no one knows why.
The only 15-letter word that can be
spelled without repeating a letter is
,
.
'uncopyrightable.
When opossums are "playing pos-
sum," they are not "playing." They
actually pass out from sheer terror.
If a statue of a person on a horse
has both front legs in the air, the per-
son died in battle. If the horse has one
front leg in the air, the person died as
a result of wounds received in a battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the
ground, the person died of natural
causes.
Clans of long ago that wanted to
get rid of their unwanted people with-
out killing them used to burn their
houses down — hence the expression
"to get fired."
Hershey's Kisses are called that

GMAT'S PiW

In Cleveland, Ohio, it is illegal to
catch mice without a hunting license.
There are an average of 178 sesame
seeds on a McDonald's Big Mac bun.
The Bible has been translated into
Klingon.
Elephants can't jump, but every
other mammal can.
Five Jell-O flavors that flopped:
celery, coffee, cola, apple and choco-
late.
Don't ever say that I never shared
with you. ❑

BY

FoR M.I.T.

(A little taste of Yiddish.)

Gehakteh Leber iz besser
vi gehakteh tsores:

Chopped liver is better than
miserable troubles.

And, believe it or not,
tastier, too!

JARC IS committed to

providing homes and services to

enable adults and children with

developmental disabilities to

Quotables

live full and meaningful lives

in our community.

"If you think Jewish mothers can impose guilt, you should see what Italian
mothers can do."

— New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani, at Yeshiva Beth Yehudah's 84th
annual dinner held in Detroit's Renaissance Center.

A STRONG ENDOWMENT

FUND, coupled with annual

giving will guarantee a solid

future for people with

"I could conduct experiments on people that otherwise are only possible with
rabbits. That was an important contribution to science."

— Hans Muench, a former Nazi doctor being investigated for war crimes after
telling a German news magazine that he was not bothered by working at
Auschwitz, and that gassing Jews spared them from further suffering.

disabilities... Not just for

today and tomorrow.

But for a lifetime.

B ECAUSE EVERYDAY

"Our comic screening process failed in this instance, and we apologize to our
readers who were offended."

— Editor's note in the "Washington Post," after the newspaper received com-
plaints about the use of the mourner's Kaddish prayer in a Sunday morning
"Rugrats" comic strip.

M.I.T? MASS A C

a baby is born who will

someday need JARC.

PLEASE JOIN US.

Call 248-352-5272.

THANK YOU

Mendel

HES FILLING

OUT AM
l-l D k)

When it was built in the
1940s, the state of Virginia
still had segregation laws requiring
separate toilet facilities for blacks and
whites.
If you have three quarters, four
dimes and four pennies, you have
$1.19. You also have the largest
amount of money in coins you can
have without being able to make
change for a dollar.

to the generous supporters

MAcNeR
TRAINING

use-ris

INSTITUTE OF TECHN01.06?

DRcP.J IJAIUT.5 To BECOME AN
ENGINEER?

QUEs-liom

THE MOST
EAUTIFUL. SIGHT HQ THE

who have contributed to the

JARC Endowment Fund.

Caring for a Lifetime.

fI

WORLD IS JOUR NAME ON A
IT 3
EGJISH
ORGA ► izATIoN'S LETTERHEAD.

.

0

AGREE DISAGREE ?"

CAMPAIGN CHAIRS

Barbara and Irving Nusbaum

OH

0

1111 %16.—

jart

THE JARC• ENDOWMENT FUND

28366 FRANKLIN ROAD

SOUTHFIELD, MI

48034

199,

Detroit Jewish News

5