Three-Way Wedding
Creating an instant family
seemed easy for Dr. Shirlee Kuhl and Peter Heytler.
Shirlee and
Samantha Kuhl
and Peter Heytler
GLORIA GOFF
Special to The Jewish News
S
weetest Day has new
meaning for a Birm-
ingham couple.
On that October
day in 1997, Shirlee Kuhl and
Peter Heytler had their first
date. Shirlee, age 40, is a pedia-
trician with the Henry Ford
Health System in Sterling
Heights and Peter, 45, is an
economic researcher at the
University of Michigan in Ann
Arbor. They met through the
Jewish Professional Singles
organization, but due to busy
schedules two months passed
until Sweetest Day.
"We clicked immediately;
there was a spark," Peter
admitted. At the beginning of
their courtship, they took long
walks in Birmingham to get
acquainted. They found they shared
many common interests, such as visit-
ing the Detroit Institute of Arts.
They communicated by e-mail
between dates and each looked for-
ward to receiving the other's messages.
"Sometimes they were romantic,"
Peter said.
As their relationship became more
serious, Shirlee told Peter of her
desire to become a parent and the
4
adoption process that she had begun
long before they met. He loved chil-
dren and was thrilled with the
prospect of becoming a "father."
Peter and his former wife were
unable to have children.
Shirlee's decision to adopt a Russian
child was based on which countries
were offering single-parent adoptions
and Shirlee's Russian heritage. Her
father's family came from the Crimean
Peninsula.
In January, Shirlee and Peter
became engaged. On March 19,
Shirlee made the trip to a Siberian
orphanage accompanied by a nurse
from her office. On April 1, Samantha
Rose, age nine months, arrived in
Detroit in the arms of her new mother
and on May 9 she was officially
named at Adat Shalom Synagogue for
her aunt and grandmother. Her new
father designed her "birth" announce-
-
ment.
On Sept. 6, Shirlee and Peter
were married at the Birming-
ham Community House in an
outdoor ceremony. The bride
arrived in a horse-drawn car-
riage. Samantha, age 15
months, walked down the aisle
wearing a pink dress with
matching flowers in her hair.
She was accompanied by 3-
year-old flower girls and a 3-
year-old ring bearer, Peter's
nieces and nephew and a
friend's triplets.
During the reception,
Samantha waltzed with her dad,
who said, "Twelve months ago I
had no idea of what was to be. I
didn't see it coming. I couldn't
be happier."
Shirlee is balancing her
career with being a new wife
and mother. She has received
tremendous support that has
helped her to adjust. A Russ-
ian-speaking nanny cares for Saman-
tha and is teaching her the Russian
language. Peter works from home
two or three days each week and the
family has "a ton of wonderful
friends - we almost have to hold a
lottery to see who gets to babysit."
Peter said his daughter is "as cute as
a button and has been our good-luck
charm." 0
11/13
1998
Detroit Jewish News
65