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For information, call Kathy Ostrowski: (248 3 22800 Civic Center Drive • Southfield / sq-LEKTE Gesmp &rang wait (-7-04c Oyer 37 Wear& ,pt • Wedding & Party Specialists L) 9 • Unique Floral Designs For All Occasions • Balloons • Stuffed Animals • Gourmet Baskets FLOWtR MOP I DAILY DELIVERIES - DETROIT AND ALL SUBURBS Commercial Accounts Welcome • All Major Credit Cards Accepted HOURS: Mon.-Fri. 9-6 Sat. 9-3 26555 Evergreen • Southfield in the Travelers Tower Bldg. between Civic Center & 1-696 Call Toll Free i-800-514-997S or 248 3S8 1520 - - FASHIONS ARE FALLING 1\ ONLY AT THE SH RT BOX The Shirt Box. Shirts And A Whole Lot More. Always 20% - 35% Off Retail 10/30 1998 HOURS: Mon.-Sat. 9:30-B • Thurs. till 7 Courtyard Center • 32500 Northwestern Hwy. • Farmington Hills, MI 48334 • (248) 851-6770 from page 40 strained love, amid the pain and tears of terminal illness. Adult children who see their parents caring for their own dying parents sometimes see them, for the first time, as complex individuals with vulnerabilities and insecurities of their own. They also see, for the first time, the depth of their love and their commitment to family. They are taught real-life lessons that no amount of preaching or lecturing can match. The end of life can be a time to resolve old hurts, to make amends, offer forgiveness, bring closure. I worked with a 51-year-old woman whose husband had left her 15 years earlier. Their children were furious with him. As she lay dying, he asked permission to visit. With the help of hospice staff, his children were finally able to tell him how his actions had hurt and angered them. And the fami- ly was able to reconcile. Often, my job as a hospice chaplain is to find the seed of something-good in a miserable situation and make that seed blossom for the good of the fami- ly. It isn't always easy. Achieving peace and understanding often takes a great deal of emotional effort and time. If we cut that period short with assisted suicide, we diminish the human capacity for compassion. Many times, when I meet a new hospice family, the patient expresses a wish to die, to end his or her suffer- ing, a wish often echoed by family members. But after hospice physicians control the patients' pain and make them comfortable, they no longer express a desire to die. Instead, they want to make the most of the time they have left. Afterwards, family members tell us how grateful they are for those last weeks they had together But few people know about hos- pice. Only a fraction of the terminally ill makes use of hospice services. Peo- ple don't trust the medical profession, and rightly so. We still rely too much on life-prolonging technology, and too little on providing pain control and support. Too often, dying patients are coerced into enduring painful treat- ments that do nothing to lengthen improve their quality of life. No won- der so many support the idea of assist- ed suicide. What if we could assure everyone that they would not die in pain, or alone, and that their families would be supported through a terminal illness? This is the goal we should be working towards. We don't need to end the sufc fering by ending the life of the suffer- e r. Those who support assisted suicide say it's an individual choice, which no one will be forced into. Americans love the idea of choice. And we all like to have options that make our lives easier. But because we have a choice doesn't mean we always make the right choice. If a choice is too easy, we tend c3 to overuse it. Many Jews oppose Proposal B because they feel assisted suicide is for- bidden by Jewish law. I still agree with this position. But my hospice patients and their families have taught me there are other reasons to oppose it. They have shown me the end of life can provide wonderful opportunities for healing, love and spiritual growth. By providing a fast and an easy way out, we will be losing a great deal. The choice is not worth the price we would have to pay ❑ Letters Policy The Jewish News welcomes letters to the editor on topics of interest to the Jewish community. We reserve the right to edit letters. They should be limited to approxi- mately 350 words. Deadline for consideration is 10 a.m. Tuesday for Fri- day's edition. Letters should be typewritten and double spaced. They must contain the full name of the writer and a daytime telephone number so author- ship can be verified. Include the town of residence or employment of the writer as well as a position or title, if appropriate. Original copies must be hand signed. Letters can be mailed or brought to The Jewish News at 27676 Franklin Rd., Southfield, MI 48034; faxed to (248) 354-6069; or e-mail to: TheDJN@AOL.COM . Letters to the Editor are posted regularly on our . /N Online website at www.detroitjewishnews.com Nat,,,MW,̀UA