•

I Jewish, also believed in putting
baby first.
"Back then, the commonly held
I belief was to let the baby 'cry it out'
at night. I didn't feel comfortable
doing it. I nursed my baby to sleep
and allowed her in my bed," she
said.
"People told me that it would
make her clingy and that she would-
: n't be independent. At LLL meetings,
I I discovered many other moms felt
the same way I did, and I soon
gathered strength to believe that I
I was doing what was best for my
family."
As she already was doing phone
referrals and answering questions
!about breast feeding among her
i friends and acquaintances, Selmar
i
I felt she was ready to become more
:
I involved with LLL. She believed that
becoming a LLL leader would add
I credibility to her status within the
. I Jewish community.
I The knowledge she gained from
I IL training complemented what she
had learned over the years about
what Halachah, Jewish law, said
,
laoout nursing. Still, she does not
hesitate to refer a caller to a rabbi.
' "It's funny," she said, "how a
woman will call the rabbi if meat is
accidentally combined with milk.
She will ask him what to do with the
pot, the meat, the counter. But, it sel-
l. dom occurs to a woman to ask the
rabbi questions pertaining to nurs-
ling."
Selmar said the information she
has learned from various rabbis over
"I the years illustrates that nursing was
intended by God and is highly
appropriate for Jewish women. She
pointed out that the Torah mentions
several stories about babies nursing.
The analogy of a baby at the breast
is used in the Torah to connote
God's protection, she added. As for
laws of the Talmud, Selmar discov-
ered the rules listed below:
* It is considered appropriate for
i a Jewish woman to nurse for the first
I two years and permissible to contin-

lo

I

ue nursing for four years.
* Breast milk is pareve.
* A nursing woman should be
completely covered as normal mod-
: esty requires, especially in public
•
places or in the company of single
men and older male children.
* A nursing or pregnant woman is
permitted to eat on the minor fast
days (i.e., the day before Purim) but
must still fast on major fast days
(Yom Kippur and the Tisha B'Av).
Exceptions do exist, for which a
rabbi should be consulted.
* No pumping of breast milk may
be done on Shabbat unless certain
medical conditions exist for mother
or baby. In general, a mother is per-
: mined to pump for comfort or
engorgement but should discard the
milk if pumped on Shabbat.
"Nursing is by no means the only
way for a mother to be a good
mother," Selmar is careful to add,
"but it is the natural way. God creat-
ed breasts for feeding, primarily.
They help nurture, feed and comfort.
Nursing helps a mother to learn
love, giving and selflessness. It is
one of God's way of teaching us to
parent," she said.
Laurie Stern, also of Oak Park, is
the mother of five children, ages
ranging from 6 to 16. She, too,
nursed all of her children, though
her decision was not consciously
I based on whatiewish law had to
say on the subject.
Today,•she realizes that her
involvement with LLL and her commit-
! ment to nursing was "a way of nur-
i turfing my children," she said. "My
obligation as a Jewish woman is to
raise the next generation. The next
generation rests on my shoulders."
She fondly recalls the LLL meeting
she attended when her first child
was born. She was not committed
to nursing at the time but she went
to a LLL meeting and was "wowed."
"I thought, 'this is for me, — she
said. "You know how you go some-
' place and you feel like you're
home? That's how it was at LLL. The

other mothers know what you are
going through."
She and several other LLL mothers
formed a play group, "because we
needed more support than just a
meeting once a month," she said.
Even though the group consisted
only of two Jewish women, the other
women went out of their way to
accommodate them. "When they
ordered pizza, they ordered kosher
pizza for us, " she said.
Like Selmar, Stern found support
for her mothering style at LLL meet-
ings. She decided to be a stay-at-
home mom and found it comforting
that the thoughts of other stay-at-
home moms mirrored her own. She
also gained valuable and accurate
facts about breast feeding that
empowered her to make decisions
for her family.
When her daughter was an infant,
for example, Stern's pediatrician

insisted on a monthly blood test for
anemia because "you know that
breast milk causes anemia because
it is so low in iron," he told her.
She consented at first, but discov-
ered through LLL that, although
breast milk is low in iron, it is easier
to assimilate than formula and it in
no way causes anemia. She
changed physicians (she found her
new pediatrician via the advice of a
LLL member) and stopped the blood
tests.
Even though nursing is the "natur-
al" thing to do, it doesn't always
feel natural at first, breast feeding
advocates know. They advise new
moms interested in nursing to seek
help and support from others who
share their views. A few helpful
words, positioning techniques or
accurate information can help
women become or continue to be
successful breast-feeding mothers. ❑

nternet Resources For Jewisi
Who N a rse

*htip://\AAANv.prairienetorg/cornmuni/health/laleche/dettvqler.htrn1
Information about: Breast feeding and cancer; breast feeding and fer-
tility; breast feeding in traditional societies; infant feeding practices in
ancient Israel; and nursing toddlers.

* http://vvww.ritualr.com/pregfaq.shtrni
Jewish links on the web; breast-feeding issues.

http://\AA/vw.mylink. net/—ime/P12Parenting.htm#Bfeed

Various breast-feeding resources-list w/links; stories of other women
plus LLL link; and nursing store.

http://194.90.124.37/eishes_chayil/index.htrn
Must first register on-line to get a password. Has breast-feeding infor-
mation for Jewish women.

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/3156/
Breast-feeding website with information on nursing and the working
woman; history of breast feeding; communication strategies.

7/10
1998

65

