EdItoR's NoTe

Talk To Me

hen I was first preg-
nant I had so many.
fantasies. One of
1 these involved the supermarket.
I envisioned myself strolling up
I and down the aisles, my little
baby in that cozy seat reserved
just for infants, cooing all the
1 while as we selected avocados
1 and cereals and herbal teas. We
1 would have such
a special bonding
time together, just
.1 us, out shopping.
The reality, of
course, is some-
; thing quite differ-
ent. Adina was a
good enough
1 shopper, Yitz did-
1 n't like it much,
and Talya
absolutely hates
going to the gra-
1 cery store. She
stands in the cart
the moment we arrive. She's
-I always trying to grab food — •
preferably glass jars — off the
I shelves, and the myriad snacks
I. (pretzels, Cheerios and, when I'm
really desperate, cookies) I've
I providedfor her eating pleasure
I entertain Talya for about five min-
i uses, if I'm lucky. Good grief, I'm
I not even near the herbal teas
and she is saying in her own - spe-
cial way (wordless, but oh-so-
I clear): "Get me out of here.
NA
ow
ll t. hle mwehainle iti !'al
am singing and
talking. I interject Talya's name
into much-loved numbers from
"Baby Songs" videos, or tell her
what I'm going to do with all the
delicious vegetables I'm buying.
Once a very pleasant woman
came over to me and said, "You
just keep that up, and don't let
anyone tell you different. I talked

to my children all the time when
i they were babies, too, and now
they're both honor students."
I'm glad she said that because
most people give me strange
looks.
Especially other mothers of
young children. The quiet moth-
ers, I mean. The ones who have
little more to say to their toddlers
than, "Sit down
and be quiet." It
makes me lonely
just to see it.
Aside from the
fact that educa-
tors say early
communication
improves a child's
linguistic and
other skills, I talk
to my children
because it seems
natural. I wouldn't !
go shopping with
another adult and
not chat, would I? So why should
I ignore my children?
I know Talya doesn't understand
much of what I say when I bab-
ble on about mushrooms or
1 canned pears. I know she has lit-
I tle interest in whether I buy this or
that brand of orange juice. But at
least she hears in my voice that I
am loving her, that she is impor-
tant to me, that I care about what
she thinks and feels (even when
she has no opinion whatsoever).
Most of all, I hope she hears that
I am glad she is with me, now
and always, even in the seeming-
ly mundane tasks of everyday
I life–like grocery shopping. 0

Elizabeth Applebaum
AppleTree Editor

5/22

1998