F oy Openers...

Who Will Question
What The Carrier Brings?

T

One final keepsake letter came from
months of work, my new book The
he impressive headline
is
a
colleague,
thanking me for agreeing to
Amazing
Story
of
the
Beths
in
America
announced "National Survey
officiate
at
a
wedding at his synagogue
ready
for
printing,
and
you
are
in
it!
of Christian Seniors," and
when
he
needed
to be out of the city.
Sharon
alerted
me
to
the
fact
that
the
the IMPORTANT
He
listed
a
few
particulars
about the
Beth
name
is
very
rare,
and
NOTICE accompanying it
happy
event
and
concluded,
"For your
her
investigation
had
shown
advised, "This official survey
information,
here
at
Beth
Torah
we use
that
less
than
1,000th
of
1
has been reserved for the
a
chuppah,
break
a
glass,
as
well
as a
percent
of
the
people
in
Christian named above."
cantor
and
organist."
America
shared
the
Beth
And just who was that
Hmmm. I'd hate to see their worker's
name! Through intensive
Christian named above? Rabbi
compensation
claims.
research
and
great
expense,
Robert A. Alper.
Anyway,
all
proceeded smoothly. The
she
located
almost
every
Beth
I declined.
wedding
went
off
without a hitch, and
family
in
the
United
States.
But the invitation did
the
administrator
and
other staff at Beth
Informative
chapters
covered
remind me of some of the
Torah
couldn't
have
been
more accom-
such
fascinating
topics
as
:
more nonsensical mail I've
RABBI BOB
modating.
*
How
the
Beth
family
got
its
received over the years. Like a
ALPER
In fact, I even sent them a present in
name
letter from an account execu-
Special to
The Amazing Story of the Beths
gratitude:
*
Important
but
little
known
tive with a big securities firm
The Jewish News facts about the Beth popula-
in
America.
❑
:hat began, "While sitting in
tion
in
the
United
States
services during the High Holi-
* Where we discovered an unusual
day season, the thought occurred to me,
"Coat
of Arms" which ancient archives
`How can a synagogue safely produce
reveal
is
over 600 years old
more income?'" The gendeman went on
That
last
item really intrigued me,
to tout his company's high-yield certifi-
I
fantasized
about what a contem-
and
cates of deposit.
porary
Beth
"Coat
of Arms" might con-
I bet I know the exact moment this
tain.
In
addition
to
the expected meno-
fellow had his fiduciary brainstorm: It
rah
and
Star
of
David,
perhaps a pair of
must have been on Yom Kippur morn-
oversize
pants
with
ripped
knees to sym-
ing, during the reading of the Haftorah.
bolize
the
youth
group.
And
crossed
He was probably so focused on the
swords,
representing
the
board
of
Dow Jones and percentage points that
trustees.
he missed hearing Isaiah 58:3, "Because
on your fast day you think only of your
business ..."
The piece de resistance of synagogue
mail arrived years ago at my study in
Congregation Beth Or, and it bore
exciting news.
"American Judaism is a rich quilt of religious expression that's unfortunately
"Dear Friend," wrote Sharon Taylor
lacking in Israel. Pluralism is not about civil rights. It is about Jewish identity."
of Copley, Ohio 44321, 'As you may
—Ismar Schorsch, chancellor of the New York City-based
already know, we have been doing some
Jewish Theological Seminary.
work relating to people who have the
same name as you do. Finally after
"This is an outrage, a complete perversion of justice."
—Former Paz Oil chairman Yosef Wolff on the
New York-based Claims Conference's decision not to compensate
the Jewish heirs of owners of Nazi-confiscated properties
Rabbi Bob Alper is a stand-up comic
in former East Germany.
and author.

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