Photo by Krista Husa

JNCelebrate

Emily Katz'
bar/bat mitz-
vah T-shirt
quilt.

Managing The Mitzvah

Parents have
come up with
some ground
rules to handle
the swirl of
bar/bat mitzvah
parties.

LISA BRODY
Special to The Jewish News

3/20
1998

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0

nce upon a time, you tried
to juggle birthday party
invitations to Burger King
and Marvelous Marvin's,
worrying that your 5-year-old would
have trouble enjoying too many par-
ties in one weekend, much less figur-
ing out how you could get him to all
those places.
That's nothing compared to figur-
ing out the bar/bat mitzvah circuit.
For most Jewish children, seventh
grade is the year. Some children are
invited to several bar and bat mitzvahs
each weekend throughout the year,
and some enjoy more sporadic invita-
tions. But for all of the parties, the
objective is the same: How do you cre-
ate a wonderful simcha and keep the
kids from getting bored?

Nancy and Bobby Schostak of
Franklin, whose daughter Jody is in
seventh grade at Hillel Day School,
were a little concerned that Jody
might get tired of going to the bar/bat
mitzvahs of all 70 youngsters in this
year's Hillel seventh grade. Instead,
"she's the first one to get there and the
last to leave," laughs Nancy Schostak.
"She loves the whole weekend. She
loves to dance. She loves the ones
where she wears fancy dresses, and the
ones they wear jeans to. All of the par-
ties are different, but the kids are a
close group of friends, and they sup-
port each other."
In the past, Hillel had a policy
requiring inviting all students in the
grade to each bar/bat mitzvah. But
with class sizes rising, the policy had
to be adjusted.

This year's seventh grade has 70
students; next year's has 85. The invi-
tation policy now is the 16 or 17 chil-
dren grouped into random
English/social studies sections in sixth
grade need to invite all of the children
in that section, as well as the students
in their seventh grade English/social
studies section. If invitations are
extended to most of the seventh grade,
then all of the students should be
invited.
Currently, most people are inviting C_E\
the entire class. However, when bar
mitzvahs overlap, choices have to be
made.
"Our emphasis is that the service is
what is important, and the party is a
bonus, to share with their friends,"

MANAGING on page 32