111111 Openers_
Words Of Wisdom
Can Bring A smile
SY MANELLO
Editorial Assistant
hoever reports a saying in
the name of its originator
brings the world toward
redemption." (Pirkei Avot
6:6). So many stories, quotations, collec-
tions exist from which we may not only
glean wisdom, but also share a smile.
One recent compilation is Wise Words.
by Jessica Gribetz (William Morrow and
Company). The following are some of
the gems she has assembled.
Life can be perilous and sometimes
overwhelming. Here are some words to
help you face life:
* Hope for the best. Expect the
worst. Life is a play. We're unrehearsed.
(Mel Brooks, The Twelve Chairs)
* If you're going to do something
wrong, at least enjoy it. (Folk saying)
* For a long, happy life, breathe
through your nose and keep your
mouth shut. (Yiddish folk saying)
* You must learn from the mistakes
of others. You can't pcissibly live long
enough to make them all yourself. (Sam
Levenson, You Don't Have to be in Who's
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* God, if you don't help me, I'll ask
my uncle in America. (Leo Rosten,
Treasury ofJewish Quotations)
* Getting inoculated with small doses
of religion prevents people from catch-
ing the real thing. (Sam Levenson)
* Two Jews on an island will build
three synagogues — one for each and a
third that neither wants to attend. (Leo
Rosten)
* A merchant from Brisk ordered a
consignment of dry-goods from Lodz. A
week later he received the following let-
ter: "We regret we cannot fill this order
until full payment has been made on
the last one."
The merchant sent his reply: "Please
cancel the new order, I cannot wait that
long." (Treasury ofJewish Folklore, ed.
Nathan Ausbel)
* Small children interfere with our
sleep; big children with our life.
(Yiddish proverb)
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will speak at the
CASS COMMUNITY UNITED
METHODIST CHURCH AND CENTER'S
Fourth Annual Benefit Dinner/Dance
VVYUR's BOB HYNES, Master of Ceremonies
On Saturday, January 31, 1998, starting at
6:30 p.m. in the Columbus Ballroom of the Detroit
Westin Hotel (Renaissance Center).
Tickets cost $60. The ticket price includes dinner,
program, dancing, complimentary parking and
a donation to the Cass Center.
Corporate sponsors include: General Medicine, P.C..
First of America Bank & Detroit Edison.
Cass Community Center programs' Activity Center for Develop-
mentally Disabled Adults, Alzheimer's Respite Care, East Std&Mln -
nines for Mentally TI1 Adults, Free Medical Clinic, Home Delivered
Meals and Soup Kitchen, Homeless Drop-In Center and Rotating
Shelter, Marie Transitional Housing, Project Scout (Case Manage-
Ment for Homebound Seniors), Safe Haven, Senior Center, and Men-
tors for "At Risk" Youth. Rev. Faith Fowler, Executive Director.
1 3 4 3 3 44 7 3 0
STEVE BROWN'S
Visit
Our
Showroom
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* You don't know how much you
don't know until your children grow up
and tell you how much you don't know.
(S J. Perelman)
* By the time your son is old enough
not to be ashamed of you, his own son
is already ashamed of him. (Sam
Levenson)
* Let us be grateful to our parents:
Had they not been tempted, we would
not be here. (Talmud: Abodah Zarah)
* To claim that a bagel has 500 calo-
ries, smacks, to me, of anti-Semitism.
(Judy Graubart)
* It doesn't pay to look too closely
into a cholent or into a bridal match.
(Yddish folk saying)
* I list blintz and blintzes together
because I never heard of anyone eating
only one. (Leo Rosten, Joys of Yiddish)
* It's so simple to be wise. Just think
of something stupid to say and say the
opposite. (Sam Levenson)
* One of the "wise men" of Chelm
said to his wife, "If I were the czar, I
would be even richer than the czar."
"How is that possible?" asked his
wife.
"Well," said the 'sage,' "If I were the
czar, I would do a little teaching on the
side." (Treasury of Jewish Humor, ed.
Nathan Ausbel)
* SCENE: A restaurant.
FIRST CUSTOMER Give me the
borscht.
WAITER Take my advice, have the
chicken soup.
SECOND CUSTOMER I'll have
the pea soup.
WAITER Don't take the pea soup;
take the barley.
The soup is brought and the cus-
tomers served.
FIRST CUSTOMER The chicken
soup is marvelous. The best I ever tast-
ed.
SECOND CUSTOMER Waiter,
why didn't you recommend me the
chicken soup?
WAITER You didn't ask for the
borscht.
(Leo Rosten, The Joys of Yiddish).
Echaim — to life! ❑
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