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July 18, 1997 - Image 46

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Detroit Jewish News, 1997-07-18

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

Les Gorback and David Bierkamp

GORbACk pl- IOTOCI RAphy

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Scenes From An
Orthodox Wedding

BARBARA HORWITZ SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS

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ressed in a polka-dotted
clown suit and a bright-
red wig, a gentleman, sur-
rounded by a group of
men, tosses flaming torches in
the air. In the center of the
commotion sits a young man, de-
lighted.
Across the room, a woman in
an ornate white dress watches
as her female friends, dressed
as cowboys and Indians, chase
each other in a high-energy Wild
West skit.
Sound like a three-ring cir-
cus? Guess again. It's a typical
scene — for an Orthodox wed-
ding.
At the weddings of Torah-ob-
servant Jews, you're likely to
find guests literally doing cart-
wheels to entertain the chatan
(groom) and kallah (bride).
At most social occasions, the
hosts entertain their guests. But
at an Orthodox wedding, it's the
other way around: the guests

ing at Orthodox weddings pre-
vents the violation of three laws:
First, men cannot watch women
dance. Doing so violates lo tat-
turu, which means "not follow-
ing after one's eyes."
Second, mixed dancing vio-
lates hatzenea lechet im
elokecha: the principle that one
should 'conduct oneself modest-
ly before God.
And third, men and women
are prohibited from touching the
opposite sex, aside from a
spouse, because physical contact
could lead to sexual activity.
Adhering to laws and tradi-
tions such as these only height-
ens the joy of a Jewish wedding.
Bradley Yellen, recently mar-
ried, explains, "It wasn't only our
simcha, because the Jewish na-
tion was welcoming another
family into the ranks, through
which more Judaism [can be]
brought into the world."
His bride Deborah, a Univer-

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At an Orthodox wedding, female guests try their best to entertain the bride.

have the responsibility of enter-
taining the bridal couple. It's
called misameach chatan
v'kallah, meaning, make the
bride and groom happy.
"People go all out at religious
weddings. You dance until you
drop," says Shira Drissman of
Farmington Hills. "You don't
care about making a fool of your-
self because you get to see a
smile on the bride's face all night
long."
Whether juggling, dancing
with scarves and tambourines,
or lifting the newly married cou-
ple up on a table, most dancing
at Orthodox weddings nowadays
is done in circles around the
chatan and kallah — men and
women separate, of course.
This custom of separate danc-

sity of Michigan graduate, says
she was not only uplifted by all
the attention at her wedding,
but also by the fact that every-
one she cared about was in the
same room, celebrating togeth-
er: "You are in the center of the
circle; everyone's energy is di-
rected toward you, and you are
elevated and energized by the
fact that you just made a terrif-
ic move in life," she explains.
Even the wedding guests wish
each other mazel toy, in addition
to heaping congratulations on
the bride and groom.
Yardena Yadin, also recently
married, agrees: "Something so
great has just happened to
you. The fact that everyone is so
happy for you is the most excit-
ing thing; it gives you a great

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